I Can't Stand That I Am Ugly, Stupid And Completely Worthless

I look at myself in the mirror and i feel like dying, i swear i do. I see pretty people everywhere around me, see how they live their perfect lives! I can't pretend that I am happy with myself and i am glad with what i am having now. I know I should be grateful, i know i am. I am luckier than most kids, i don't need to sit by the sidewalk and beg for food or search the rubbish dump for food. Yet, i feel some part of me feeling totally unworthy, like i am stupid and have no future!

I hate those pretty girls! With their pretty faces and perfectly sculpted body. They get whatever they wish for. They are popular, smart and evryone wants to be like them. So, it got me asking myself, why am i different? Why am i seen in a different light? Why must i force myself to do thingts i dont like just to be successful, so that people look up on me?

I know I have been a huge dissapointment. I feel like burrying myself in the grave. I feel like a loser! I am trying to be who i am, is that wrong????
fuglygirlonthebench fuglygirlonthebench
22-25, F
27 Responses Apr 7, 2011

I know exactly how you feel. You're not wrong to be who you are. You're brave. I wish I knew who I was...
Keep being you because you're beautiful and perfect just the way you are.

I had just come upon this post, just looking for desperate relief of my own pain. You probably won't see this, but I just wanted to say this for anyone else that may come upon this with the same feelings as you do. I have felt the same way as you do for a long time and I still do. First I want to tell you that you are probably a very gorgeous girl, your problem is you can't see this by simply looking in the mirror. The mirror lies, it lies with a passion it doesn't really capture your real image. The mirror can't show you the way you look when you smile from doing the things you love. Only the people around you can see that, and sadly a lot of people want to destroy that happy loving smile. Don't ask me why, I still can't figure out why someone would want that.

Another thing is guys, just because guys don't flock over you it doesn't mean that you aren't pretty, it could actually be that they think that you would turn them down and their afraid. Guys usually look for vulnerable girls who will instantly except their requests, but eventually they will get older and more mature. Then they will start to look for serious relationships and that's where you come in.

One last thing is that your feeling of worthlessness could very well be a medical problem and if it gets really bad you should ask someone for help. All these feelings are part of the battle that many face, it is to build you up to your full potential. I hope someone out there could benefit from this and all this typing is actually going to some good use.

Ouch I feel for you I know this story is a few years old has things got better with the perspective of your self

Add a response...

I`ll try to make me understood. Maybe suffering for quite a while from your outer appearance helps you to look behind the polish pacade of others and you`ll see, that behind all the glamour they are not definitely content. Maybe, some of those pretty apperances are discontented. You can`t really know. Some people are handicaped by birth for example. They will never be able to compete with others. It`s not their fault. They did nothing wrong. Suffering for some time gives them more personality, more understanding, more empathy for less previleged person. And some develop a very charming and warm sense of humour. In the end, that`s what really counts. Getting older, you´ll lose a lot of glamour anyway, if you used to be pretty/handsome in younger times. If you`ll learn to cope with disappointments in early days, you`ll have a treasure, that will help you for all your life. Sorry for my english, my german would be a little better.

Why do you have such a negative image of yourself?

Ms. Imagination Loser, the girl in that photo sitting under the tree is cute looking, tall and good as a fair lady... at least from my personal view. Just a little off mood, brooding something.

I've always been told I was beautiful
Every time I hear it, I cringe and instantly don't want to get to know the person who gave me such a superficial compliment
Maybe being "ugly" was a blessing in disguise for you
Being beautiful is only a prerequisite to inferior people
I remember force feeding myself for years and crying that I couldn't gain weight because I thought it would keep my abusers away if I was ugly
When I got older I was known as the pretty goth girl because I didn't talk to anyone and they would always tell me that if i just smiled... MAYBE I DON"T HAVE ANYTHing to SMILE ABOUT!
I was jealous of the preps, and their perfect lives, always laughing, until I found out how ****** up they were too,
The funniest guy in class was handsome and intelligent and always picked on me but in private would hit on me
I hated him, turns out though, his mom committed suicide and his dad could give two ***** about him
My friend had bad dandruff, horrible skin and was a huge geek but I was jealous of his calm and self assured essence and the fact that he had an amazing dad who was a writer and read him every great novel every night by the time he was 10
Long story short, life gets easier as you get older and your not being forced to be around superficial people with raging hormones clouding their already limited judgement, branch out and shine in your best attributes and that will shine through whatever physical setbacks you think you have, til eventually your forget about them and realize that that void wasn't meant to be filled with something superficial, but with something meaningful

I just realized how old this was lol but I hope things have gotten better for you love

I bet you are BEAUTIFUL ♡♡ and smart! Be WHO YOU ARE!! You don't need to be jealous because some girls who surley have done many surgeries ( who cares even if they didn't, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL) and thats the most important thing:). I have the same problem until I discovered I have Childhood ADHD, and I don't have the guts to face my parents.

You don't need to be beautiful from outside but most importantly is to be beautiful from the inside because people with brains (healthy brains :p) focus on your personality more. Improve yourself ,I know, you know and this whole world knows that you can be better IF you can be YOURSELF :)

Don't beat yourself up. I bet you're more attractive than you think you are.

You may feel worthless now but nobody is worthless ever!! I used to think exactly the same as you!! I had so many problems!! Involving my kids. But the only person who can stop you feeling this way is you.... Sometimes you need to be rock bottom before you can see it but nobody can change your situation but you. I know from experience its easier said than done.. but don't you ever let anybody put you down people that put other people down or talk about you behind your back are behind you for a reason.... You don't need too hurt other people to make you feel better about yourself which means your already so much better than them... You think about what you have and how good it will feel when you pick yourself up and show something of yourself by doing well in life and nothing giving a care on earth what people think of you!!!! That's a bigger slap in the face too anybody that ever put you down than you sat feeling how ever down you feel.... Look to the future..... You can change it nobody else.... Nobody is worthless ever.... Stop putting yourself down!!!!!.......... (20mg of clipalopram from your doctor helps!!!!!!! Trust me!!!) Chin up lovely your doing great so far. Xxxx

Owh **** off i'm sorry, yes you've been bullied...but most people have, you're not even that bad you just seem like an absolute attention seeker. If you hadn't noticed about 70% of the population is average or ugly. You are just noticing the pretty ones. STOP WASTING YOUR LIFE!

people like u never understand.

You are exacally the kind of Discusting humanbeing who makes poor lovely people feel like they do..... clearly the ones who feel the need to put others down like you do are the ones with problems..... Get a grip.

Don't be a ***** to her she needs help and you are destroying her you are such a bully.

i know. what makes you happy.? also what is happy and how do we get it anyway?

you said you are trying to be who you are. i think you don't know what that is or what you want. maybe i am just relating allot i don't know you so i can only say from my experiences. all those beautiful people are going to stay beautiful. and you are always going to be you. its really up to you if you want to be beautiful. i cant tell you how.or how to fell better . maybe start with trying not to compare your self with others. for me that only makes me aware of what i am not. <br />
also becoming beautiful will not change anything except for the kind of people you attract. also i have to work at what makes me happy. you talk about beautiful people but you also talk about people getting what they want because they are beautiful. not always true you have to work at what you want and what makes you happy. that is the hard part

read you story hope all's going well on your quest, listen to hideanseek speaking true words, where he comes from if your a cast to other indians you non exsitent. but i know your heart is heavy but you realy need to build on your confidence trust me, build that and the world is yours , if it halps look at all the successful peeps round the world who are not so good looking that didn't hold them back.<br />
<br />
your still young you have a whole beautiful life ahead prosperous life ...

looks have always been a priority when it comes to people around me

my friends scan my body everytime we go out and i feel totally self conscious!!

You are NOT a loser, and I'm certain you are not ugly... {{hugs}}

i really really want to be pretty, to be able to look at my reflection for once and smile broadly.<br />
<br />
your comment touch my heart the most because you sound so honest like you cared and you understand. thank you!

Oh, so many things you say are so familiar, as I feel the same quite often. While I don't have real advice on the looks issue (I wish I did...I'd be putting it into practice for myself!), I will say:<br />
<br />
~Just because someone is pretty doesn't mean their life is perfect. I find this thought comforting because if it really were perfect, I'd hate them too ... but everyone has their own problems...even the beautiful people.<br />
<br />
~One thing that keeps me going is the pursuit of other goals .. namely career goals. I've thrown myself fully into school and the pursuit of my chosen career, as I feel that if I succeed there, I may achieve this elusive self confidence which may lead to the supposed 'someone who will love you for your true personality because looks aren't everything' that everyone always tries to tell me when I point out my utter lack of physical attractiveness.<br />
<br />
In any event, keep your chin up and try not to dwell on it too much! (easier said than done, I know!)

TT i so want to believe u...

@hideandseek : well, i will definitely try but it wouldn't be easy...<br />
@vishalj : yeah, it's sad that people still judge each other by their skin colour. that's being very very shallow! thank you for the kind words. :)

Hm.. Try going to the mirror, look in it, and think of only what you see in front of you. Don't think about what other people would say. Don't think about how anyone else looks. Just focus on you and how you really think of yourself. Think of it this way; if people that looked like you were considered beautiful and they were the one's that got all the attention, would you still think you're ugly?

I have tried all these years but nothing ever gets better. My confidence is non-existent, how do i start?

Exactly. You can't please everyone. So instead just work on pleasing yourself. I know it's tough but you can do it. Stop comparing yourself to other people, for one. Just because you don't look a certain way doesn't mean you're ugly. I promise. Everybody has things they hate about themselves, all that matters is that you have confidence. It's easier than you think.

But we are living among people, among the society where you get judged and criticised every single day of your life. It's hard for me to accept the person i see in the mirror. It always got me asking, " Why must i be the one with this ugly face, flabby thighs and fat body? " " Why must i be the girl who look in awe at other people's achievement. They say that when god takes something away from you, he gives you something in return. To me, it's just a way to lie to yourself and console yourself. Well, I am going through a tough phase in life and sometimes, nothing feels better than letting go. T.T

you seem to have hit my metaphor right on the head.

I'm sure you aren't though. :] You should at least try to be perfectly fine with the way you look. In my opinion worrying about how you look is a total waste of time. Just be happy with yourself. What other people think is of no importance. Trust me.

ohh..thanks a lot. ///hugs/// it just sucks being ugly!

I am right there with ya, darlin.' It's like I know looks aren't everything, but it'd still be nice to be seen by other people as attractive.