Addicted to the Dew
Posted July 30th, 2009 at 5:08PM
Hi, my name is dudedrama, and I'm addicted to Mountain Dew.
"Hi dudedrama."
My addiction started innocently enough: My mom would give my siblings and me our "juice" as part of our standard breakfast of Cap'n Crunch or waffles hot out of the toaster.
My elementary school's snack bar sold us Mountain Dew for $0.10 less than Coke or Pepsi because our town had an MD bottling plant.
Late at night, during high school, I lived off Mountain Dew as I swung imaginary swords and cast pretend spells during late night rounds of D&D.
When I was in a punk band (no, you wouldn't know the band so I won't even name it), I wrote a 1:34 long song called "Mountain Dew."
I quit a job in textiles when they pulled Mountain Dew out of the soda machines. I probably should have stayed in that job, but I was just soooo pissed.
Even as I type this, Mountain Dew is on my mind. I need my Mountain Dew, even though I have this big-*** pain in my tooth and I know it's the Dew's fault.
I've gone most of this day (since morning) without MD... oh agony, when will you end???
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You do know that if you drink too much mountain dew that you'll burn a hole in your stomach? It's true! Think, all the acids in it can burn (no duh, it's acid) through you, and the stomach acid will spill, and you'll die. Sounds lovely, doesn't it? But dude, you REALLY need to kick this addiction before it kills you.
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