Holiday From Hell

When I was 15 I went on a long family holiday, whilst on holiday I got a lot of unwanted attention from guys. Before this holiday I was dating a guy that I'd been with for a few years. I had lost my virginity to him a few months before my rape. He was my first for everything, someone I thought I loved.

Anyway whilst on holiday I was walking to the shop during the evening. A young male approached me, he had previously been trying to talk to me but I ignored him. Simply because I was not interested in anything he had to say. He didn't take well to this and decided to confront me and curse at me. I once again ignored him. Lets just call him Chad.

As the weeks went by and my holiday was coming to an end, some of my family members decided to throw me an out door going away party. The party took place on a Monday. Monday the 7th of September 2010 a day I will never forget. The party was going great, I was enjoying my last day with my family.

Throughout the night I noticed Chad at my party. I ignored Chad but I noticed him watching me throughout the night. Eventually he worked his way over to me and before I knew it we started talking.

The only reason I spoke to him was because I was leaving the next day so I thought 'Why not'. My biggest mistake! I remember thinking to myself, wow Chad seems like a decent guy. Maby I shouldn't have ignored him. As we spoke on he told me about his life and his girlfriend that lived abroad, and how she was coming to see him soon.

Slowly people started to leave the party because they had work or school the following day. Me and Chad were so caught up talking that before I knew it there were only 3 people left outside, myself, Chad and Chad's friend.

I said politely to them both that I was tired and wanted to sleep but I didn't know if I should clean up or wait until the morning. I decided I'd rather go to sleep. As I jumped down from the wall, Chad jumped down and grabbed my hand. He said to me 'come here I want to speak to you'. He said this whilst pulling me away I remember looking at Chads friend. The look that he gave me was enough for me to gather that something bad was going to happen.

Chad pulled me behind the back of my family's home. He pushed me onto the wall and started touching me up and down. Chad was at least 25 but rather short and muscly, I was also short but very petite.

I calmly tried to push him away, telling him that I wanted to go inside. I didn't want to kick off just in case it made the situation worst. The events that then took place happened so quickly. Chad became very aggressive he tried to ripped my leggings off, he was so forceful that he almost ripped my navel piercing.

He used his body to pin me on the wall whilst putting his hands down my pants and panties. He successfully pulled my leggings down and inserted himself into me. I tried to hardest to fight him off, I was in so much shock that I didn't think to scream or shout. I just knew that I had to fight him off, I repeatedly told him to get off of me and that I didn't want to do this.

The only thing I recalled Chad saying to me was 'This is what you wanted'. Before I knew it he had ********** inside of me. His ***** was all over me, all over my clothes, my body and my shoes. He swung me round, hitting my face off the wall and proceeded to get what he wanted.

Throughout this I was looking up to the sky asking God to save me. Trying my hardest to get away from him, once again he carried on and ********** inside of me and on me. When he was finished he peeked around the corner to check that no one was around and walked off. Leaving me in pain and full of *****. I sneaked inside my house trying not to disturb anyone. I sat on my bed in utter shock and disbelief. I never once cried, I couldn't.

The next day I remember being paranoid. Paranoid that I might see Chad. I was so happy to leave, it was only when I was on the plane that I broke down and cried because I realised what had happened to me. When I returned home the only people I told were my sisters but I made them promise not to say a word.

Every day I cried, every day I hated myself, every day I wanted to take my life. I lost a ridiculous amount of weight from the whole experience. I told my boyfriend at the time he thought I was lying. He thought it was a way getting him back from cheating on me whilst I was away. He abused me verbally about my situation, using it against me. It got to the point I was a angry person. I was angry with God, my family, my friends, every and anyone.

My friends started to ignore me, my boyfriend acted like he hated me and so did my family. I eventually started to go counselling which helped. It was after counselling that I broke up with my now ex boyfriend. It took a while but my life got back on track slowly.

I'm now 19 in a happy relationship. I'm currently at University. I don't class myself as a 'victim', I'm more of a survivor. My rape still bothers me from time to time but nothing like before.

If you're going through what many females have. Don't give up, seek counselling or some form of help and turn your life around. It can be done xx
JAP93 JAP93
18-21, F
6 Responses Jan 11, 2013

I'm sorry you went through this. You're stronger now. The world needs more strong people who care. The guy who did this to you has an appointment with fate.

If I met dis whack wigga, Id bitchslap him!

OMG Jap, I feel so sorry for you! I hate it when it is not mutual. I am so sorry. I would kill this mother=F@cker if I ever catch him. x

Wow, I am sorry to hear about this Jap :( ..Had I been there, I would have said "Dude, get off of her, you're hurting her!" And I am definitely not the same person as this Chad guy... If I meet him, I'll demand from him a very sincere and heartfelt apology and some kind of gifts or payment to compensate for the pain you suffered! :( I think you are a very beautiful girl! :)

I notice you add me, and saw this after. I'm sorry what happen to you :( it's like you always see a person type *sorry* cause that seems the only decent emotion to do right?

Yes, it is. Thank you :)

should have reported it even if it was later on it should never have happened. A real scum bag.

I didn't think to do that, I did leave the next day and wanted to leave it behind

Yup move on. Live strong. Learn to be wary but live. Keep being strong.

Thank you, that's exactly what I'm doing