I keep looking for validation from other people that what happened to me was horrific. I guess it's because part of me still can't seem to get it into her head that it was rape and wasn't my fault.
mwdot mwdot
22-25, F
4 Responses Aug 15, 2014

This is the hardest part of dealing with anything like this. Whether it ends up in court or not, whether other people believe us or not, the hardest part is forgiving yourself for allowing it to happen in the first place.

It was not your fault and you could not have predicted what was going to happen before it happened. Nobody goes around expecting to be raped because if we did we'd be paralysed in our own fear of it. Hindsight is 20/20.

I think that we'll always blame ourselves a little but it will get easier over time, and with a little help from others. The way you are feeling and acting is normal and understandable and lots of other men, women and children who have been sexually abused feel the same way.

I'm leaving you with a link to a book that has really helped me to make sense of it. It's free to read online and written in a very gentle style. I hope it helps you too. Much love and take care x


I'm here if you need to talk

I think about what happened to me everyday...it's been four Years and I still haven't come into terms with it :( I hope you find peace with it, it will be hard,,I haven't found peace yet either. But I hope you will, I don't know you but I love you and I hope you feel better

If you indicated in any way that you did not want to perform a sexual act and the guy went ahead anyway, he may be, almost certainly is, guilty of rape. You need no one else's validation that you were violated.

Proving rape in a court of law may be more difficult unless you reported the rape as soon as possible after it occurred and allowed physical evidence to be taken.