I Can't Forget My Assault..

When I was 14 now 18 I was sexually assaulted by 2 guys, it was the worst night of my life and I know it's not my fault but I can't help the way I think, it's been almost 4 year since its happene but still everyday it's on my mind, it's all I think about, I have experienced many things due to this assault, I haven't been able to sleep properbly since, I had to drop out of school because I just couldn't concentrate, I don't trust anyone not even family anymore, I confined in my brother mrs a few days after the assault and went tithe police about I and the guys were taken to court but one was let off and the other was sent to a mental hospital, it still gets to me everyday that they coup be doing it to any other girl and I cant stop that! Iv tried moving on with my life but nothing seems to help, iv pushed it aside for soo long that my emotions are just building up and I can handle it anymore, what do I need to do to get this outer my head, I know it's never gonna leave me alone but I just want to sleep without waking up in tears from flashbacks, I don't know how to deal with it any ore and it feels like I have no one to talk to, has anyone been through the same sorta thing and has some advice as to how I can begin my life again and try out this behind me because nothing I do is helping anymore, my innosence and security was taken from me that night and I can never get that back but I want to trust people again and not be depressed all the time, please help !!
Dependantone Dependantone
18-21, F
May 13, 2012