This Is Not What I Had Pictured For My Life

Everything was so beautiful in the beginning.But isn't that always how it is ?It was for me anyway.
I had met her while i was building a new house in a new town after many years of being single,and I thought that I had finally found the one
thing I had always wanted,a healthy relationship with someone who had my back.After a few relationships that had went sour,I thought that this time I would'nt screw it up.WRONG.Looking back in retrospect,I did exactly that.I won't go into all of the details,as it would take far too long to explain,but the main point is that a life was lost and I have be held responsible for it.It was nothing criminal or anything like that.
Her and her 2 sons were living with me and her oldest son was going to get in trouble with the juvenile system and after many attempts to
rationalize with him,I lost my cool and screamed at him 1 time.I had worked hard to gain both of their respect,but it was not to be.As soon as he graduated from high school,he announced he was moving out the following day.Shortly thereafter,he met a girl and she talked him into joining the military.He did acknowlege later and thanked me for having his back,for he would not have gotten where he was if I had'nt.
He loved military life and it's structured enviroment,and he had a different wife and a new baby girl when he volunteered for deployment to
Afghanistan.He came home early...in a box....and I grieve alone now....and it is more weight than I can bear.....
lonewolf73 lonewolf73
46-50
May 20, 2012