I Need My Glasses

I'm not very good at reading signs.  I really can't interpret when a woman is flirting with me as opposed to just being nice.  They seem to be pretty much the same thing.  Overt flirting is another thing.  I can see that but that is really more like hitting on someone than flirting.  I really don't know the signals to look for when a woman wants you as opposed to just being friendly.  I wish women were not so vague.

ReformedAutomaton ReformedAutomaton
41-45, M
27 Responses Jun 8, 2007

LOL...I like the way you think :)

One good way to determine if they are flirting is to respond as if they are. If she slaps the crap out of you, she wasn't flirting.

hmmm??? I can see that I think...can you tell us more?

I feel the same.. but in reverse. I have a hard time reading men.

Well I think most of them are just drunk and having fun. It's amazing how differently women act in that environment.

I work as a pedicab chauffer. I pull people around in a cab behind my bicycle. It's fun, we work in the downtown party district here, known as 6th street. Lots of live music, bars, dance clubs, etc.

I didn't mean to disregard what you said. In my line of work a lot of women are flirty and make comments like "nice ***" but I always feel like they're just being friendly or trying to act bold in front of their friends.

I was talking about real life women LOL

That's funny cause I've always interpreted women that say "you're hot" or something sexual to be feeling safe enough to say that cause they're married or have a boyfriend.

Sorry you had to go through that. Hopefully you won't let that put you off. There's plenty of women out there who are flirting and not playing games. Go find them!

Oh my goodness, I was just getting ready to share this experience and had no idea that it was already here! You pretty much read my mind! There has been one girl that I've actually pursued a relationship with. She was always super nice to me, and I kind of thought she was flirting. I would flirt with her, and she seemed to like it. Finally, I wrote a rap for her telling her how I felt about her, and it turned out she was just being friendly. I feel your pain 100%.

I guess it would depend on how you go about sparring with them. It could be flirty or it could be just friendly play....depends how you go about it.

Definitely a flirt. I wish I met more women like you :)

Thanks :)

Don't it's a sweet quality !

haha, I think that's normal for a woman or at least more common. I feel weird being that way as a man.

I take everthing as kidding . You literally have to tie a note on a brick and hit me with it,before i get it.

thanks): *hugs*

awww, thanks slutslider....you have such great suggestions :-)

vague huh? so what......i'm a fun flirty girl. and us women just are way too complicated and complex for you men. now here's a few pointers:<br />
A girl tells you hey that's a really nice tie- Nice<br />
A girl says that zit isn't noticeable- Nice<br />
A girl is like oh my gosh, you're smokin' hot- Flirt<br />
Wow you have the prettiest eyes- Flirty (if she's not married)<br />
A girl squeezes your balls- Drunk as f.u.c.k, really wants to be laid, or is giving you an old fashioned vasectomy<br />
* it just really depends. when a girl is really giggly and smiles a lot she is usually flirting and if she says it in a pleasant tone and just giving you a compliment on something then she's being nice... and she could even possibly like you and is just too afraid to express her passions, desires, and lust for a lovely man as yourself.

Well sometimes they tell me they do...but I don't see it in action much LOL

argh! what a topic! it's one of those that has the potential to have a hideously long answer. here's my theory and the way i figured out if a man was flirting with me or being friendly. i'd mimic him but in my feminine way. if he looked my way and smiled, i'd do the same and up the ante by tossing in some 'shimmer' eyes (my way of smiling brightly but with my eyes). i waited a few moments and would look over every once in a while to see if he was still looking my way or to see if we caught eyes again. each time he'd do something, i'd mimic it in my fem way and then up it a bit until finally he came over and spoke to me. (i couldn't ever bring myself to approach a man - i'm WAY too shy for that!) if you're in a conversation where it's face-to-face, observe the body language and how she smiles. is she touching you frequently? that's a DEFINITE sign! at least it was my sure fire "i'm flirting with you sign!" it might be a good idea to brush up on the art of body language specifically of the flirting woman.

Thanks guys (and girls!). I really appreciate the advice.

Well, now. All my questions are being answered. Good story, Siddler! By the way, I could be wrong, but it seems AlwaysRemembers could be flirting with you.

I am a HUGE flirt, i'll start by looking over at the guy, so he can SEE me doing it, than when he looks at me i usually smile and look back at my friends like it didn't happen. I'll do that a few times and if i see that i am being looked at again, i will typically go to the bar, order a drink and make sure i pass the guy, perhaps slightly bumping into him and than with a big grin, apologize. If i'm not *innocently* flirting than i will make it VERY clear that i am interested in getting to know you. I might be as bold as sending YOU a drink. Body language is a HUGE key to all of this and i admit it must be confusing sometimes. But even if a woman is sitting with friends and slightly turns her body towards you, so she can almost always see where you are that is a pretty good sign. Also playing with our hair while smiling at you is a HUGE sign that someone is flirting with you. Apparently, and i'm not sure if i even do it, but i have heard that it's almost a give away, if we turn our bodies towards you and cross our legs so that the top leg is pointing in your direction. I'm sure i do this and studies say that women do this OFTEN completely unaware of it. YES, we are difficult to figure out, BUT when in doubt go FORTH the WORSE that can happen is she is not interested AND if so .... who cares??? You'll probably never see her again anyway. NEVER miss an opportunity if you think you are being the ob<x>ject of flirtation, probably even though we are difficult to figure out, ALWAYS trust your gut instincts, they are usually right!! Good luck and make sure if you think someone is flirting with you, flirt back, that's one way to find out for SURE. Also even in emails etc. our little xoxo's or *hugs* are a way of internet flirting as well as the infamous wink. Nice meeting you, she says with her legs crossed pointing towards you, flipping my hair with a small smirk on my face. HUGS and xoxo ;)

wow,thankyou,i needed to know that,,i am a single dad with three kids,,and for some reason,i get myself into terrible trouble,,,i have gone shopping with a couple of female friends,,they say they cannot believe my behaviour and the women in the shops,,they have said we need to get a fecking bed,,but me and my wicked sense of humour,plus they say i am very tapped into my femine side because of the kids,,but for the life of me,i would not read the flirting signs,,it has got very bad lately,,god i must watch in future,,i might find myself a lovely woman,and not know it,,

Women are vague if you don't know what to look for. the internet is full of web pages that explain it. the way the play with their hair, eyes shine a little brighter, slight touches, sit facing towards you (legs) as opposed to just turning head, etc. So many signals. best is the voice and the way they talk. Keeping the conversation going, slight compliments, giggles, hanging on every word you say.

Well no doubt I can see why you feel that women are vague. We are often times. Some women do things with their eyes when they are flirting like batting their eyelashes. I know that when I flirt I joke and laugh and in doing that there is usually a really nice compliment that goes along with it. Kind of like when you say something funny or humourous that can be taken in a good way so that you don't look like you are being too forward or aggressive. I am good for doing that when I flirt! It's hard to explain but guys usually get it when I do that. Sometimes while driving if I see a cute or attractive guy I might raise my sunglasses and look at him.