I Cheated...

Shortly after our first year anniversary, I had a six month affair with a friend. The sex wasn't great and he didn't give me attention that I wasn't getting at home. I only continued because of the excitement it caused, the thrill of getting caught. A little over a week ago, I told my husband what had happened, he let me know how he felt. Fortunately, we are still together and are going to try and get through this.

My dillemma, our friends found out, my husband's best friend and his wife, who is my best friend. We also found that we might be pregnant. I know 100% that the baby belongs to my husband, although he doesn't trust me about it. His friend also keeps telling him that he needs to leave me, unless the baby is his, which I have a feeling he is only saying because he doesn't believe a father should abandon their children. I hate that he wants my husband to leave me so badly and it makes me uncomfortable at the thought of even being around him because of that.

Will this feeling ever go away or will I have lost two of my best friends because of what I did?

smhayde smhayde
22-25, F
4 Responses Mar 14, 2010

What kind of person is married for one year and then cheats? Cheats for six months. Cheats, and then intentionally gets pregnant to keep a hold of her husband who by all rights should be divorced from such a selfish person. What kind of person cheats on her husband, intentionally gets pregnant, forces her husband to live with it, and brings a child into a terrible, painful situation - intentionally? Yes, it is clear by what you wrote above that getting pregnant was intentional and part of your selfish, devious plan to entrap your husband. His friends are right! He needs to get away from you! You have already severely damaged him and you are going to ruin his life. Let him go. If the baby is his, offer the child to him and his family and sign off on your parental rights. That is the only way to attempt to make this right. Then see a therapist.


Relations work in a quid pro quo manner. If you did something wrong that really hurt your husband than he will most likely do the same thing to you .Once you lose the trust in your marriage then it's all over.

You'll find in an ironic twist when you cheat all the pleasure you get from the "outer" relationship (sexually, mentally or physical) turns to suspicious, self loathing and depression when your caught or confess your deeds.