I Choose To Be Faithful In A Sexless Marriage

Similarly my husband has been chronically ill with heart disease & cancer, now in remission and is in no shape to have sex but our relationship still stands and he still shows me in many ways that he loves me, we have been together for 37 years tomorrow and I am his wife as well as best friend and caregiver.  I do not miss the sex, I don't dwell on it, just the fact that my husband stays as healthy as he can.  He's had quite a few health problems lately and was quite ill in the hospital so I am just happy that he is here with me.  I know he would do exactly the same for me, he's a great person, the best person I have ever known.
waynenan29 waynenan29
51-55, F
3 Responses Dec 14, 2010

There is a very large difference between standing by a spouse who is physically unable to have sex due to an illness and maintaining fidelity to a spouse who WON'T have sex and refuses to get help to address the issue.<br />
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I think it is beautiful to stand by the person you love in times of their suffering, and kudos to you for showing such loving kindness and support to your husband.

Ahh now this is one I can relate to. My beloved has had a six year battle with Liver Disease. It has been tough but we are muddling through. She does do the one thing she is able to sexually for me. I need not elaborate :-) At first I said no because I didn't want to be self centered. But that actualy hurt her. This illness really took her sense of femininity & womanhood. My saying no made that worse. She also just wanted to say thanks for all I do as a caregiver. Like she really had to twist my arm twice..LOL <br />
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I am sure your husband is dealing with many of the same feelings, except regarding his sense of manhood. If he is able (& he should be able to) he could do things other than intercourse for you. It could help him regain his sense of value as a husband & like he is doing something special just for you. Just some food for thought. Pun intended..LOL :-)

im delighted to read of your loving bond, so sorry to reaqde of the sickness that affects you both, youve made my day knowing of your lo0ve out there! i hope the new yeasr brings you more love and lots of remission!<br />