In the Dark

my husband hasnt touched me for two years he cant give me a reason i know hes not cheating and at first i felt hurt and rejected ect now its becoming normal to go without sex,i have never cheated on him but what is he thinking surely he has to imagine i might eventually if hes not putting out i have a healthy sexual appetite so you can only imagine how difficult its been for me,i love him but am starting to question how much lately he can be moody and is a bit of a loner im at my wits end he wont seek help what should i do im lonely and feel as if im fast losing my conection with him. lauren

hanginout hanginout
5 Responses Jul 3, 2008

Truer words were never spoken...."im lonely and feel as if im fast losing my conection with him". I feel the same way. I tell my husband that isn't just the intercourse it is the emotional connection that comes from intimacy. But when the intimacy of sex is lost....what makes our relationship any different from any relationship either of us have with others. It is the physical touch that helps us to stay connected to our least that is my opinion. When we are no longer intimate with our mates that connection gets lost.<br />
BTW it seems to be mostly people in our age range that are having these problems. I didn't have kids so it can't be the "empty nest thing".....

leave him you are missing out on the joy of life

Having an affair is not the end of the world.

If all else worked okay between you two then a sexless relationship would not be a big deal.. but you've written that you feel like losing the connection with him... So you probably need a bit of private time to sort things our for yourself. You don't sound happy, and the kind of person who'd have an affair... So you gotta make a decision... I hope whatever that might be will lead you to find your happyness

That is a hard one. The main thing that comes to mind is to first Be Faithful to Yourself - Don't put yourself in a situation that can hurt you due to your lack of having intimate moments. Those type of situations can have long life consequences. Example: Some people proceed to break the law out of emotional duress, (an emotional need). Breaking the law has an eventual consequence, (no matter what reason given). Again, First and for-most: Be Faithful to yourself. If you are faithful to yourself you won't endanger yourself by reacting in a rash way. Please take care and if I can think of anything else to help I will leave it for you to read.