I Am Usually Quite Peaceful, But....

I am usually quite a peaceful person. I don't much like confrontation.I will almost always walk away. Except when it involves my kids!

We were at a small local amusement park one hot summer day, me and my son and daughter who were 10 and 8 at the time. We had just finished cooling off in the lazy river , drifting on inner tubes and feeling peaceful.  The kids decided to ride more rides and got in line for the paratroopers.I decided to sit this one out and found a bench directly in front of the ride. It was a long wait, but finally my kids were the next to get on. They had each just picked out their plane and got in when the biker dude appeared.

He was tall and dressed in leathers, biker symbol on the back of his jacket, black biker boots, chain drive wallet.He came down the midway and swaggered up to the ride.The ride was full and the tall skinny teen-aged attendant was putting up the chain to block off the entrance. The dude pointed to my son and began telling the attendant that this kid cut right in front of him. The attendant told him that he would be first on for the next ride. This wasn't good enough for the dude. He began yelling loudly at the teen, pointing his finger in the poor kid's face,and demanding that he get on this time. The kid was clearly intimidated. He walked over to my son and said something to him.My son ,with a stunned look on his face, got off the ride and the dude took his place.

My son came to the bench and sat down. He had tears in his eyes as he told me the worker had told him he had to get off. My blood was boiling! I looked up at the ride attendant and he gave me a look that said, I'm sorry...I didn't know what else to do. I told my boy that I would take care of it. He said," No mommy, please don't say anything.That man is mean."

When the ride was over, I positioned myself just in front of the exit and waited for the dude, hand on hips, and mouth loaded and cocked.As he approached me , I said " I hope you are proud of yourself, lying and getting an 8 year old kid put off a ride so you don't have to wait your turn". It was just about now that I really noticed just how big the guy was. He started yelling me and saying he didn't know what  the hell I was talking about... with a few other phrases unsuitable for children's ears thrown in.It was becoming obvious that he was somewhat impaired from some substance or another. My son and daughter were both pulling on me ,trying to get me to shut up and leave. I continued, "You really are a big man, aren't you ?"

I took the kids' hands and turned to walk away. I was a bit concerned about the possible repercussions for what I had said to him. I was thinking perhaps we'd better leave the park NOW. I had taken a few steps away when I was approached by two security guards. They asked me if the dude was giving me trouble. I described what had happened. One guard told me that this was the fourth reported incident with the guy. They went to the dude, took hold of him and escorted him out of the park with the dude yelling and cursing the whole way.

My kids ( and I) were greatly relieved to see him gone. Both of my children kept saying that they couldn't believe I said that to such a big mean man. I was a bit amazed myself, but at the moment I did it, all I could think about was how angry I was for what he had done to my son.He was a bully, and I don't tolerate bullies.

The story has been told many times by my kids, with a certain amount of pride that their mom would stand up to the biker dude.



datura datura
56-60, F
83 Responses Jul 31, 2008

im proud of u mam:) that was a gr8 story. pls if u have anymore good stories to tell pls do so:)

Now see here Tasmin. I can't go searching through 86 comments looking for yours!! EP has given us these lovely improvements and we should take advantage of them by only writing new comments!

I really admire your gesture. You are not oniy brave, but wise too. There's a time to be patient and a time to stand up to abusers. Moving according to the demands of the circumstances is the quintessence of the I Ching, my bedside table. An automatic peace sign in all situations shows a poor understanding of the dynamics of psychic totality.

Thank you. I love your comment

Thank you :)

Dear -i ride bikes everyday and encounter AS# HoLE# like this every day. Most of us are working class people who do charity work and donate time and monies to those who have not . I am so sorry you had to deal with one of those types in front of your children . I have three boys of my own ,and they learned manners and respect -this one apparently did not ! Again ,I am sorry and hope you will not judge "bikers" by the actions of one jerk ...

Thanks for your comment. Yes, I've said in other comments that I have many biker friends who are involved in charity work and are great people. I just ran into a very bad apple!

He deserves some broken bones.

you madam are brave

Thanks Hermey and I'malonelyguy! The kids really were proud of me that I stood up for them.

cool story...love it

Thanks, Penguinswon!

Well done you, and good that your kids choose to remember the proud moment when their mother fought back rather than nasty moment when the biker idiot (dude is far too nice a desc<x>ription!) upset them on the ride. Whilst it may not have been the most sensible approach it was an excellent distraction technique!

Thank you, Inspector. Thankfully it ended well!

I'm a relaxed, laid back guy but I actually admire your restraint as much as the courage. Pretty much I'll roll with things as they go, but mess with my kid, and the primal "KILL and not give a &%$@ about dying in the process" mode kicks in BIG time! Would have been tempting to catch him leaving at the end of the day and see how he liked the tables reversed...Bike vs SUV style.

good job at standing up to him, that take guts, your 1 of those moms whos got guts and I like that

Wow what a douche lol

I am sorry you had this experience. I hope the outcome is not that we are all labeled as trouble makers in your mind. We are not all mean and nasty. <br />
Hope you have a great day.

Hey, I am a biker too.<br />
<br />
And I do know the difference.... hehehehe<br />
<br />
Most of us are civil, gentle people.<br />
<br />
love and peace

Hi Lbronson. In my mind, you are a real biker and not a biker dude. I understand why you could take offense at the title of the group, though. I am aware that real bikers are good people. There is a terrific organization in my state for bikers that is aimed at public education, protection of the rights of motorcyclists, and charitable works. They do wonderful things for needy children in the state. I have real bikers as friends, neighbors, and family.<br />
<br />
Please accept my apology. No offense toward an entire group of people was intended.

I am a biker dudewith the bikes, leather and so on to prove it. I also see a lot of folks dressing the part who dont know a bmw from a bowel movement. I think a better group name would be I FACED DOWN A BULLY. Posts like this just reinforce the stereotype. Real bikers support charity runs, not terrorize children. have a nice day.

well, i am the baby and the smallest in the family. My RL sister weighs in at around 25 lbs more than me. Also, she is a theatre matron and is used to moving dead weights.<br />
<br />
hehehe<br />
<br />
I remember once when a young man got rude and abusive in the streets. Well, I lifted the bottom of my shirt to reach for my equaliser while she, on crutches said "No, don't shoot him. I want to give him the hiding of his life. He will never live it down - beaten up by a woman on crutches". <br />
<br />
needless to say, he took off in his car like a bat out of Hell.<br />
<br />

Hehehe--I can just picture it, Sir b.<br />
<br />
But seeing as I weighed almost a hundred pounds less than you and the dude was way over 6 feet tall and well over 210 lbs, I didn't think that decking him seemed too prudent!

Heeheheee big sister.<br />
<br />
I must say that you are wonderfully civil. My RL sister would have decked him with a fist to the face and the rest of us (four brothers) would have "discussed" it with him "not so gently" and taken him to the hospital. <br />
<br />
Oh, and I am the lightweight at circa 210lbs.<br />
<br />

Thanks for commenting, SchmedleyDoRight. The "instant alpha" made me chuckle. That's sort of how I felt, too!

Even though this is an older post, I had to comment on it. I absolutely relate to it. Even though I am male, I am on the thin side, and have traditionally been viewed as the 'Intellectual Type' (synonymous to the Bully-Type as "Victim"), but have been stunned by the veracity with which I will defend my children. Instant Alpha.


Cool. As a father, I congratulate you, although my civil part has to say you could have gotten your butt beat or seriously hurt.

Fair play to you. Sometimes certain people can just tip you over the edge.

Hi Robyn! I only grow datura for the pretty flowers and it's ability to ward off evil.<br />
I'd be too scared to smoke it, given it's ability to be fatally toxic!

;d ha ha i'm not surprised u had it in you!! and we wWILL do things for our kids won't we.....:)

a mother could kill for her young

Thanks, Bushwackr!<br />
Someone has to stand up to the bullies!

Godd for you

That's the truth, whatsitallfor!

herebutnot, you are right.We do need to look out for one another.<br />
<br />
Michelledaly, we mama bears aren't to be messed with, for sure!

Wow! What an awful end to a lovely day. I mean it was good that you spoke up to him but the guy on the rides should have had a walkie talkie to security and that traumatic experience for your son would have been avoided. I am so glad it was ok in the end - could have been really nasty. I think you're a typical gutsy mum! You can TRY and mess with me but don't dare mess with my kids! Well done!

I commend you on your courage and being fortunate enough to escape that incident without injury. While this guy's appearance and behavior made him conspicuous, it unfortunately isn't always obvious by looking at someone whether or not they have nothing to lose by causing trouble. We live in an age where people are able to arm themselves to the teeth, walk into an auditorium, lock the doors, and start shooting. Our only defense against that kind of thing is looking out for each other.

Thank you ladies.<br />
MS, yes, I truly feel in my heart and gut that I needed to get 'er done. My son has grown to be a gentle giant of a 20 year old who stands up for the underdog and can defuse a bully with words. Had I let the dude terrorize us, perhaps my son would not be the same guy he is today.

I was thinking about your "Am I foolhardy" blog as I read this story. I still say, "nope". You sound like a person who is courageous enough to follow your heart and intuation. Plus, this crank needed to be put OUT of the park. From one Good Momma Bear to another - "Get 'er Done!"

Wow! You are one hot mom. I mean it in the sweetest way possible. What a great true story. #^^#

Thank you, my friend!

That was brave,but couldn't the guy have waited until you left the park and beat up/shot you and your children?Still well done.

Kaerix, I have had the same thoughts that you state in your comment. I can say that at the time I felt I was in a public place with a lot of people close by which gave me a feeling of relative safety. I did not step within his striking range, I was back far enough to be out of his immediate reach.<br />
<br />
Perhaps I was foolhardy. But at the time, I just really felt I needed to say something to him. When these moments happen, often people just do what seems right at the time. I'm sure there have been some tragedies.<br />
<br />
I also tend to listen to my gut instincts, and they told me to act. Fortunately for me, it turned out ok.

I think it was a bit risky, but I guess that's obvious or it wouldn't be the story it is about being brave and such.<br />
<br />
The whole time I was thinking "what if it goes wrong?" It's not just you yourself at risk, if it took a turn for the worse the kids would see that and be affected very differently. Not only would their mother be hurt, they would learn the consequences of doing that to be very bad.<br />
<br />
In that case they could become extremely resistant and sensitive to it, or go the easy route and simply become subservient.<br />
<br />
I'm not saying what you did wasn't what you should have, or that it was. It was risky, and I have no idea what I would or should do in such a case.<br />
<br />
Now that I read this story, I guess I would avoid the guy, look for security guards or somebody trained to deal with it, and talk it through with the kids so they are ok.<br />
<br />
But I still wonder what one SHOULD do. The world would be a better place (overall) if everyone stood up to those kind of people, but statistically speaking, there would have to be some tragedies mixed in too...

I ride my own Harley and have been to many Biker rallies including Sturgis, so I guess you could call me a Biker enthuasiast, (female) and I'm NO MAMA, that takes on a whole other meaning. I have found that if you stick up for your beliefs, with them they will generally back down and respect your rights, as long as you respect theres. I was the first Female District Rep(Pres.) for our local ABATE organization back in the late 80"s, and from the first, alot of the guys were against a woman running their local organization, but when I first riped out the cord to the Juke box at the Bar that I held our first meeting, because now one was paying attention, and the ones that wanted to couldn't hear me, and visaversa. That set the stage for me to let them know I wasn't gonna take any crap from them no matter how big they were, and I didn't have to. They stood up for me, Period. <br />
<br />
It takes one tough lady to stand up to someone that may or maynot be that tough. <br />
There are alot of people that wear the biker look just for intimidation purposes, who may not be a biker at<br />
all, All I can say is that I'm with ya, especially if it has to do with kids, my kids, or anyone else's kids, injustice is injustice. AND throw in the substance abuse angle, and you got real problems no matter what he's wearing .

Dantura im very proud of you for standing up for your kids. Unfourtunately we live in a sick, ****** up and creul world, also its sad that ******** like that biker are out there.

Been there. I passed a biker who was going about 40 MPH and I was going about 45 MPH maybe a little faster (the speed limit I think was 40 MPH.) He did not like that I passed him so at the next intersection he tries to pass me(unsuccesfully). At the stop light he gets right up on top of my vechile(just me and my teen daughter) and starts ranting and raving at me. Next thing he's pounding on my car. I should have called the police and didn't. I just wish I knew who some people think they are and why they think there better than everyone else.If I was speeding(I passed a highway patrol just a few minutes before I passed him) it is not his right to beat on my car and harass me!

Drewberry....I might just have to do that...have it put under a nice peaceful lotus!<br />
<br />
Mo 08...I hope you are claiming your own power now. It's amazing to me how many people have been bullied. I was attacked by two girls when I was a kid while walking to the store. To this day, I have no idea why. I think that event was the very moment I decided I would never tolerate bullying.<br />
<br />
Mountainman! The poem is absolutely awesome. It made me feel strong and proud to be a woman, and a defender of my brood. Thank you so much for sharing it.<br />
<br />
Sugarburn, I hope that now in your adulthood you are claiming your power and standing up for yourself the way your family should have stood up for you.<br />
<br />
SAINTan...good on you, too.Our love for our families gives us that extra bit of courage sometimes to do what is outside the norm for us.<br />
<br />
Jesse, I am happy to hear that you are involved in AA and are changing your life and finding empowerment. The point of power is always in the present moment....now is when we can makes the changes we need to make. Best wishes on your journey to reclaiming your personal power.

Datura: I wish my parents would've stood up for me that way. I grew up with a lot of fear of people and bullies. There was a kid down the street who's dad taught him to fight. He bullied everybody. I told my parents and they said there's nothing they could do. So, me and another older boy, chopped up his skateboard. His dad called my parents and they gave me **** for beign mean. Next time he picked on me, I said "Call his parents." They just said they couldn't do that, and they both walked away from me. Instead of becoming mean. I became too nice. I'm now 52 yrs old and facing this stuff. With the help of the AA program I'm changing my life. Facing up to my boss and people at work, who used to intimidate me. I was suicidal all my life, because of this stuff, so it's really good that you did, what you did, in front of your kids. It told them that you have self worth and that you value them and their self worth. Hopefully they won't have to live a life of fear and loathing, but stand up to the creeps and the bad guys, in the world.<br />
Good for you!!!

trash like that needs standing up to. if only the public united against individuals like that then there would be less of them. but fear turns us all away.<br />
<br />
I have done things that I would not normally do, when my children are involved. its what we HAVE to do for our family.<br />
<br />
good on you

That was a wonderful thing you did for your children. As a child I desperatly wanted my parents to stand up for me, not against a scary, tripped out biker dude, but against their own family. They never did, they let me suffer to save rocking the boat, and it hurt me more than I can say. So when I read your story it made my day, because you are an amazing mum and I'm so glad people like you exist. People who are unafraid to rock the boat and get angry for their children. People who think their children are worth the trouble ten fold. I think that is one of the most important gifts you can give your children :).<br />
Have a great weekend :)<br />

Brings Kiplings ole poem to mind sorry for the lenght of it. But hey I didnt write it. Ya done good.<br />
On that note enjoy!<br />
Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936)<br />
The Female of the Species<br />
<br />
WHEN the Himalayan peasant meets the he-bear in his pride, <br />
He shouts to scare the monster, who will often turn aside. <br />
But the she-bear thus accosted rends the peasant tooth and nail. <br />
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male. <br />
<br />
When Nag the basking cobra hears the careless foot of man, <br />
He will sometimes wriggle sideways and avoid it if he can. <br />
But his mate makes no such motion where she camps beside the trail. <br />
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male. <br />
<br />
When the early Jesuit fathers preached to Hurons and Choctaws, <br />
They prayed to be delivered from the vengeance of the squaws. <br />
'Twas the women, not the warriors, turned those stark enthusiasts pale. <br />
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male. <br />
<br />
Man's timid heart is bursting with the things he must not say, <br />
For the Woman that God gave him isn't his to give away; <br />
But when hunter meets with husbands, each confirms the other's tale— <br />
The female of the species is more deadly than the male. <br />
<br />
Man, a bear in most relations—worm and savage otherwise,— <br />
Man propounds negotiations, Man accepts the compromise. <br />
Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact <br />
To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act. <br />
<br />
Fear, or foolishness, impels him, ere he lay the wicked low, <br />
To concede some form of trial even to his fiercest foe. <br />
Mirth obscene diverts his anger—Doubt and Pity oft perplex <br />
Him in dealing with an issue—to the scandal of The Sex! <br />
<br />
But the Woman that God gave him, every fibre of her fr<x>ame <br />
Proves her launched for one sole issue, armed and engined for the same; <br />
And to serve that single issue, lest the generations fail, <br />
The female of the species must be deadlier than the male. <br />
<br />
She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast <br />
May not deal in doubt or pity—must not swerve for fact or jest. <br />
These be purely male diversions—not in these her honour dwells— <br />
She the Other Law we live by, is that Law and nothing else. <br />
<br />
She can bring no more to living than the powers that make her great <br />
As the Mother of the Infant and the Mistress of the Mate. <br />
And when Babe and Man are lacking and she strides unclaimed to claim <br />
Her right as femme (and baron), her equipment is the same. <br />
<br />
She is wedded to convictions—in default of grosser ties; <br />
Her contentions are her children, Heaven help him who denies!— <br />
He will meet no suave discussion, but the instant, white-hot, wild, <br />
Wakened female of the species warring as for spouse and child. <br />
<br />
Unprovoked and awful charges—even so the she-bear fights, <br />
Speech that drips, corrodes, and poisons—even so the cobra bites, <br />
Scientific vivisection of one nerve till it is raw <br />
And the victim writhes in anguish—like the Jesuit with the squaw! <br />
<br />
So it comes that Man, the coward, when he gathers to confer <br />
With his fellow-braves in council, dare not leave a place for her <br />
Where, at war with Life and Conscience, he uplifts his erring hands <br />
To some God of Abstract Justice—which no woman understands. <br />
<br />
And Man knows it! Knows, moreover, that the Woman that God gave him <br />
Must command but may not govern—shall enthral but not enslave him. <br />
And She knows, because She warns him, and Her instincts never fail, <br />
That the Female of Her Species is more deadly than the Male. <br />
An dats de truth. Lol<br />

I F***** HATE BULLIES.. I USED TO SUFFER SH** FROM THEM when i got into high school.. i was the new kid u know... So i really had no one by my side.. am glad it's all over

Now all you need is a TAT that Sez 'Don't mess with Mother'

rzingg, thanks for your comment..it made my day!<br />
<br />
Cycle man, it does look like one of the Village People, doesn't it!! Sorry, I didn't put it there, someone 'surprised' me with it!<br />
<br />
TimmyL, I'm glad your sis was there,too. Women have no business being bullies either. And I'm well aware that some women can be terrible bullies!<br />
<br />
Sacajawea...loved your comment.Thanks! Here's to Girl Power!

You have made my day. You know why? Because I didn't realize you were THE MOM! I assumed you were the dad - I didn't notice your flower username or your avatar.<br />
<br />
I literally did not know until the last sentence of your story that your were the mom. Way to go. Way to effing go.

Nice work Datura! I had a similar story myself, except that it involved women...getting out of line at the waterpark. When I tolds them that we've been waiting for a long time, they just told me to shut the **** up. <br />
<br />
Good thing my sister was around to tell them who the boss was.<br />
<br />
I am the sort of a guy who does alot of work for women's rights. But when women exploit their rights, it ****** me off like anything!

The picture here looks like one of the Village People

Datura,<br />
<br />
I just read your story and I am really impressed with your courage. Whether you are like that "normally" or not you did what was right. <br />
<br />
You provided the best example for your children, and those other people who witnessed the incident, of how a person is supposed to act when confronted by an injustice...<br />
<br />
You are not supposed to just lay down and take it...like the poor kid running the ride...I feel real sorry for him because he gave into to his fears and must live with his feelings of helplessness and his lack of courage to stand up for his rights and the rights of others.<br />
<br />
Your children have a mother they can be proud of, and they will walk taller for the rest of their lives and hopefully will carry on your example in their own actions for the rest of their lives and then pass it on to their children...<br />
<br />
You earned alot of respect that day, as well as mine today... well done.<br />
<br />
Rob Z

Thanks, litehearted!

Thanks, Ladies! I was having a real "I am woman, hear me roar!" moment!

Datura, that was an incredibly brave thing for you to do. Good for you for sticking up for your son!<br />
<br />
I would never in a million years have had the guts to say anything to him - I'm hopeless at standing up to people! <br />
<br />
Plus I would have been too scared if case he had a weapon.

Now that would be funny! LOL

Thanks, TUM. Too bad the Power Rangers weren't there to kick some biker butt!

Biker Jerk that is! Glad you stood up to him. He sounds like a real ***.

Thanks, Owl! He really was a jerk!

Good for you standing up to the jerk!

Haha...IWM! Who knows what lurks behind this peaceful facade!

Datu.....you are starting to scare me a bit!! LOL....<br><br />
<br><br />
Rock on!! You are one awesome woman!

OK. Alter egos are so much fun.

Wisdom is nice enough....but hotness is nicer:)

What do you mean hotness?

That is by popular request.

First I'll have to go back in the archives and find them!<br />
<br />
Glad to see you looking less wise and more hot, FT!

Yeah...what she said. We dare you.

I should post some photos lest you don't believe me!I remember going to a wedding in a sleeveless dress and my old Hungarian great uncle kept saying "Look at her arms! Look at her arms!" <br />
I was thin and sinewy, with huge biceps.Oh, rock hard abs too! .......This was before the day when the female body builders began looking so mannish and huge and scary!

I agree that you should never get between any mother and her children, whether that be humans, bears, dogs, or alligators.<br />
<br />
But I am fascinated by Datura's body builder physique.

Thanks Ladee. It's something that a mother would understand...old mama bear defending the cubs!

Not a professional wrestler, but when I was at the top of my form from landscaping everyone thought that I was a female body builder. I had muscles like you wouldn't believe.

Just gets better ....

No, you didn't tell me that, but I certainly believe. Weren't you a professional wrestler at one time? Peace said so.

Oh heck .. dont mess with datura!!!

Yeah, FT. I'm a lover too, but I can be a fighter if I need to be.<br />
<br />
Did I ever tell you about the time I grabbed a sledge hammer out of an crazed guy's grip just as he was ready to pound another guy over the head with it in the middle of a fist fight? True story, too.

*batting eyelashes*<br />
<br />
My hero.

It is something how we all remember certain moments that created a big impression on us and maybe even define the way we think of someone.

It was a short moment, but I'm sure it had a huge effect on how your kids perceive you.

Why thank you, Alan. I guess at the time I thought that it's not Ok to let kids think bullies should get away with it.I really felt I needed to do something.

Very well done. You are a brave, strong woman.