He Took It Offline- Cheater In the Flesh

I was married for 3 years this past September. I feel so stupid because I didn't see any warning signs that he was cheating. We were together 24/7 (own a business together). I now believe that the game Runescape is what ruined our marriage.

I honestly believed him when he told me he was just playing this stupid game. In reality, he was "falling in love" with another player all the way across the country. I had no idea.

He left me without warning on Thanksgiving. He told me that he was going on a trip with his brother for 2 weeks. He didn't come back. I later found out he was 3,000 miles away meeting this girl. They had been planning it for months. They had planned for her to get pregnant while he was there. I was devastated.

He came back to our state in mid-January. She followed just a few weeks ago. Since then it has been non-stop harassment. They can't seem to leave me alone. I did file for a divorce, and he has promised her my business and everything out of my house. He is trying to take everything from me so he can give it to this girl. I just don't get it. She is very low-class, unattractive, and uneducated. She had a fiance that she lived with while she was hooking up with my husband! He and I have been talking and comparing notes. This went on for well over a year and neither of us had a clue!

Watch out if your spouse plays these games. They can ruin your marriage.

FlyBunny FlyBunny
6 Responses Feb 12, 2009

There is a reason World of Warcraft isnt allowed in my relationship. <br />
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I played it for fun, he played it for ""fun"" if you know what I mean. :/ I found out by playing his char. and some ***** started talking to me over the voice chat. Busted. That was 1 and a half years ago. Now - Its online E-mail cheating he's into. Go figure.<br />
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I keep my info private from him. (This is my personal space) Where I can vent, help, comfort and assist others and myself. My E-mail, he can have, My facebook, he can have..this is a no go. This is mine. <br />
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Im sorry to hear about your ""man"", its not fair...but let me let you in on a secret. What he reaps...will be what he sow's. It will be his single greatest regret in life I pray she is illegal....you can call 1866-DHS4ICE. (Thats the illegal immigration number). Have her shipped out of the country if she is an illegal. And this snake known as a Ex will get in so much trouble himself. <br />
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May his life be full of pain, regret and sorrow. There is no space in the heart of such foolishness morons.

(I'm the OP)- She is unattractive, and that is putting it very mildly. Everyone that has seen her is shocked. She's about 5 feet tall and over 200lbs. She has spiked multi colored hair and many unfinished tattoos. She has piercings in her face, etc. I'm not knocking that lifestyle, but my husband (so I thought) was not into that "look". He was constantly on me about my appearance, criticizing every morsel I put in my mouth. If I gained one ounce, I swear he would point it out. He was bent on me being a living, breathing Barbie doll. (as if).<br />
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Now he's brought her all the way across the country to live with him and his brother. He has no job and neither does she. They are living in the fantasy world that they created on Runescape- no bills, no jobs, nothing but the two of them "madly in love". Obviously, when reality sets in their little world will come crashing down. I wish I could be a fly on the wall to watch it happen so I could point and laugh.<br />
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This girl is a slob. She is dirty, uneducated, and a complete leech. I don't understand what drew the two of them together. I guess it's one of life's great mysteries. <br />
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As for the potential for infidelity from having an EP account, all I can say is that if someone is bent on cheating, they will find a means of doing so. Personally, I am not wired that way. My membership here is brand new, but had it been active while I was with him, I would have gladly shared the login info.

True.. it can happen anywhere.

I guess I'm stuck w/ pointing out the obvious, but aren't the possibilities for this kind of crossing emotional boundaries even greater on EP than on something like online games? Should EP come with a warning label? "Do not allow your spouse to have an Experience Project account unless (s)he shares both nickname and password!"

BTW, I also want to add, that I know what you mean when you say she wasn't attractive in any department. The 'girl' my ex was messing with had sent my ex a pic and he had it hidden on our puter, but I found it. She looked about 14 frackin' years old! NOT attractive and had nothing going for her. She had the nerve, when I confronted her, to tell me to 'get a life' and I responded that it was obvious who had 'a life' as she had wayyy too much time to sit in front of that puter and play games all the time... I mean, did she not work or go to school?<br />
She had the body of a child and was very ugly in the face. I had so much going for me at the time I couldn't understand it and neither could anyone that knew me. And that **** was married and they both would talk about us behind our backs. Maybe me and the hubby should have hooked up. lol<br />
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One of the great mysteries of life, I guess...

I totally agree and can really relate as the same thing happened to me which led to my second divorce. The game was 'The sims' online then later, 'Star Wars galaxies' online. They too were planning to meet behind my back. But, I busted him. He was a total moron. I wrote about it in my story 'I bet my ex is dumber than yours' so I won't repeat the ugly details. <br />
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Even IF they never met in person, they were sharing an intimacy that is only meant for the two of you. By crossing those boundaries emotionally, it is cheating by all means. I do not believe you have to get physical to cheat. There are many ways to cheat and the internet seems to be the easiest. <br />
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I'm very sorry you have to go thru all this pain and BS. It isn't easy. I hope they leave you alone soon. Maybe you should get a restraining order??? on at least, the girl if they are harrassing you. Not sure if you can do that, but it may be worth checking into.