I was in the bath and I just couldn't take it anymore. So I cut up my right hip so bad that the water turned red all around me. I got so scared that I stood up to shower but I got so tired that I lied back down and just rested as cold water fell on me from above. Obviously, since I am writing this right now, I am okay. It was my first time in over a month and I was amazed that I that I just could not stop myself. I couldn't. Which, possibly sounds pathetic or just stupid, but in reality, I could not stop cutting at my skin.

I deserved it.

I deserve possibly something a lot worse. But not today. I am too tired for any more.

SunkinLies SunkinLies
18-21, T
3 Responses May 12, 2012

Please don't hurt yourself. There are people who care about you. You cam message me if you want to talk about something.

In what way you deserve?

all ways I guess

Yes you are guessing but no deserving reason is quoted by you.

I'm a failure at everything...I should be in pain. It makes sense.

There is no failure in life. Failure feeling comes only when we want us to do beyond our limit and when we cannot do. If I am 5 feet 4 inches, maxium I can jump 6 feet and touch an object kept at a distance of 6 feet. If I feel I want to jump 7 feet, which we know impossible. But we think it is failure. So, we all do everything within our capacity and limit. If we ask Roger Federer to play foot ball he will fail.

1 More Response

You don't deserve it for feeling the way you do. <3 PLZ don't hurt yourself, I'm here for you.