I Cut My Self

"f.u.c.k.", Read The Knuckles...

By: ImEndangeredGimmeYourCola

Written on October 9th, 2009

I started cutting myself back in 2007. I had to switch schools and was all alone. I had already been pretty depressed for about two years. For some reason the though of self mutalation just became appealing to me. I went a couple months before anyone found out. My friend's mother found a picture of my scarred wrist on his phone. She called the school, & the school called my mother. They kicked me out until I went to KYS (Kettering Youth Services).

I was in that hospital for about two weeks before I convinced them to release me. Though I had not stopped cutting myself, I have a very persuasive tone. I would have been fine if my mother hadn't found my left over razor in the bathroom floor. After that she forced me to go back into the hospital. I was not very happy with her decision. Once I finally got my aunt to let me move in with her in South Carolina, they released me. So I moved away and things slowly got better. I was still cutting at first, but things stopped after a short while.

I went almost two years without cutting myself. I did not body damage, other than piercings and tattoos. Though there is a lot of drama I'm not including in this, because the details are long. Long story short, I'm cutting myself yet again. Only a select few friends know about it. Most of them want to kick my *** for doing it again, after I was doing so good. I don't honestly care though. It's my body and I'm going to do what I want with it. I'm not going to push them away just because they care, but I'm not going to listen all the time. Pointless advice personally, I already know it's bad for me.

[[If you don't understand the title to my story, "F.U.C.K." is carved into my knuckles. Oh, and please excuse my spelling]]

By: ImEndangeredGimmeYourCola

Age: 18-21 , Female

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7 responses

YB01

Do you suffer from MPD ?

Mar 21
1 like
emochicka

I live in South Carolina!

Jul 28, 2012
1 like
xoFakeSmilesox

**** life is carved into my knuckles(: I know what youre going through and it is hard. ive cut for going on three years and i do it every day around 12 times a day. It ******* sucks to know that my parents know what I'm doing because I go to counseling and they kep an eye on me round the clock. But quite frankly I dont care anymore. Just keep your head up. Youll make it if you just believe. Promise.(:

May 23, 2012
1 like
AsmayZora

i wrote F. U. C. K. on the back of my hand and it was deep and noticeable

anyways your friends shouldn't be saying stuff like that i have friends that i know and what they do is support me and you need to tell your friends that. tell then than you don't need a lecture you need support.

i told my friends that and they agreed to support me, and i havn't been cutting as much since then cuz i knew they cared enough about me to do that. so you should try and talk to them about it.

Dec 14, 2010
1 like
joeXstrife91

you know the truth behind my story... You're the only one that needs to know it... It brought us together... My pain...became our happiness for a time... Yes things are hectic right now... But like in our past...this will become a thing of happiness.... I promise...

Oct 13, 2009
1 like
Healbot

I cant tell you how many people do this. I know that one of my lovers came to me all beaten and broken he was what people call meat abused as a child and being pimped out he didnt know what home felt like what true love was or could mean I never forgot the way he came to me and the way he is now since then ive had 1 more come to me that way and he too has stopped cutting since i give them what they seek and they call me home because i not only provide them with the pain that they need but i provide them with a story every night a bed with me skin on skin, touching holding a true sence of being and i am there strength there purpose there hope and I wont allow them to be hurt even tho they are strippers they still have morals and i respect them for there little things that make them them

you have to find that someone i share my bed with 5 to me they are my family and everyone of them is Irreplaceable.

Oct 10, 2009
3 likes
caits111

hey, reading ur story helps me feel less like the only freak in the world tht cuts.im prob much older thn you, but you should know tht i find comfort in your story and it helps me feel less alone, thanks for being honest and sharing :)

Oct 10, 2009
3 likes

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