It's Been 4 Years...

I haven't cut myself in over 4 years. It's not because i don't want too or because i'm scared. It's because my boyfriend said if i do it, he's leaving me. I think about it everyday. I want to feel the steel blade run across my arm and see the blood. I want to feel the pain drain out of me and onto the floor. Lately I've been thinking that maybe i should start again. So much as happened in the last few months and I just cant seem to get it together. I think i'll start again because if i don't i might just lose myself and everything i worked for. But i also know that if i start again, I'll be losing him. In the end I'm afraid my addiction will win.. One of these days. 

JustSaveMe JustSaveMe
26-30, F
1 Response Feb 28, 2010

Be strong!