It's to Quiet Without Him.

  Let me start by telling you all that I am a USAF girlfriend, I've been dating my airman for a little over a year now and let me tell you, the day he came to me and told me that he wanted to join the USAF I was proud of him, but way more concerned of what it may do to our relationship. Realizing that this was a selfish thing I quickly got behind him and supported everything that he wanted to do. So here I am now, waiting for that letter, the TV on as loud as it goes, and if there isn't a TV the music is as loud as it can be with me huming along to whatever is on the radio. I find that the hardest thing is getting used to having no one else sitting next to me on the couch. That there is no one there to talk to when I really need it, not to mention going to bed alone and waking up to a wall of pillows that I must have arranged t some pont in the night to make me feel better. I miss having someone come to bed with me, laying there and telling me they love me before I fall asleep. Even more, when I actually do manage to fall asleep waking up because I hear a noise and realize that it isn't him waking me to tell me "I Love you babe, go back to sleep, but gimme a kiss first." It's just some random creek or crack in the house waking me up to remind me that I am alone. I try to keep as busy as I possibly can, reading whatever I can get my hands on only to cry since I neer eem to realize that there are romance novels, I make noises to keep myself entertained the same way that he did when he was home just to let me know where he was in the house. I'm finding out just how hard it really is to be a USAF girlfriend as well as a soon to be wife, at least then I will be able to travel with him which makes things a little easier for me to get through. I miss him more than anything these days and would give almost anything just to hear his voice and be given the time to talk to him. I know that there is a chance that he can call and I keep my phone on me at all times, trying my hardest not to tie up the phone lines just in case. I write daily, causing me to go through a lot of stamps which aren't cheap, but I really don't care right now, I want to tell him everything and I try.

  With each passing day I come that much closer to seeing him again, as of right now I am trying to buy a video camera to record his graduation as well as taking many pictures and recording the time that we have together. I want everything on tape giving me something to watch and another way to hear his voice. I find myself calling his cell phone just to har his voice. I can't believe I didn't save any of his voice mails on my phone. How stupid was that one?!

  More than anything I am proud f him, I am so lucky to have someone who is trying to really make something of himself and wants to be with me, but this is so hard to think that until I graduate from college I am stuck here waiting for him to come home to me. I'm heart broken because my heart is inLackland TX but I am happy and proud to say, I am a USAF grilfriend.

donspanda31 donspanda31
22-25, F
Mar 8, 2009