After Some Thought

I have realized that I deserve better then you're lies.

I opened my heart out to you, gave you all I could give of myself, and you ripped my heart to shreds. Through our whole relationship you always told me things I now know were lies. I don't see how anyone could lie like that to get attention. How could you lie about being raped, about having an abusive family, about people who don't exist.

I felt for you, I thought you were a wounded angel and I was going to sweep you off your feet, get you back on track, help you. Well i guess i did huh? Guess I became of no use after that.

And although I'm still crushed about it, although I still love you as I type this, I have come to realize something thanks to members on EP, that even though I love you, you dont need to love me back. And thats okay. Because during our entire relationship you DIDNT really love me, did you?

You used me.

You lied to me.

You played with my emotions.

You hurt me.

But you know what?

I forgive you.

Its okay, because I love you, I think youre one beautiful messed up individual who needs help, who needs friends, who needs support. And I can't speak an ill word towards you, besides the truth. That you are a liar, you are a heartbreaker, and you are a manipulator. I say all that with love though, with kindness. I hope you find the solutions you are looking for in life, i hope you find someone that you wont hurt or lie to. I am really happy that i could help you, even though it cost me so much.

And if you ever find the want or need to message me, thats okay too. I will be here to talk to. And who knows, maybe one day after you've got your act together we can once again be a couple but not just yet luv. Not for a very long time.

I actually want to thank you, for showing me what it feels like to hurt, what it feels like to be betrayed. My skin has grown stronger thanks to you.

Still love you lots and wish you well.