Holiday SpankingWith the approach of Christmas, I thought I would share one of the rare Christmas spankings I've had to give to one of my children.
Before I start, I know some may not agree, but I've always treated holidays as any other day in regards to expectations of behavior. They may get a hair bit more leeway due to the holiday, like an extra warning, but if their misbehavior continues, or they do something serious enough to earn an automatic spanking, then they receive one. My feelings are if you make holidays non-spank (or non-punishment) days, then you are sending the message to the children that it's ok to misbehave on those special days. They need to know the rules are still very much in place, as well as the consequences if they break those rules. I'm sure all of us parents have learned how important consistency is in all aspects of raising our children, but especially in regards to discipline.
As for my story, this was almost 9 years ago, on Christmas morning. Our middle daughter, who was 12 at the time, was excited to get to the presents. Although ironically, her younger sister and brother (3 and 11), were being much more patient than she was. Of course my oldest (16) could only just shake her head at how she was acting.
As I was getting my coffee, I could hear the whine "Come on mom, everyone is already here." which is when Jennifer, my oldest, scolded her to settle down. When I walked into the living room, I gave Kahlan (12 yr old) a firm look and told her that Laura (3 yr old) was acting more mature than herself. What really was annoying me is we have instilled with them that Christmas isn't about getting gifts, but the act of giving and celebration of the birth of Jesus. But of course it's understandable children look forward to their gifts, although she never this bad in prior Christmases.
She settled down though, and it was going well, at least for a short while. When Laura had grabbed a second gift to open, is when Kahlan started to whine again. "Moom, she just opened one, isn't it my turn?." This is when I began to really lose my patience. Where she had her share of spankings at that age, she usually was not this immature and selfish, but I was just so disappointed on how she was acting this morning. I scolded her firmly that she really was acting childish. And if she didn't stop right now, she would get a spanking.
Instead of arguing, she bit her lip and said "Ok...I'm sorry." I smiled and said "Good, honey. Now you can go grab one of yours and open." It didn't last long though, as Laura once again grabbed a second gift after opening one, and Kahlan just grabbed it and said "No! It's my turn!" which then Laura lost her balance, fell down and started to cry. I quickly went over to Laura, and she was fine as she fell straight down on her bottom. However, I was extremely angry with Kahlan. I stood her up, and swatted her hard three times on her pj covered bottom and told her that she just earned herself a spanking.
She started to cry hard, not only from the swats, but also from being told she was going to be spanked. Of course she tried pleading not to be spanked and promising she will behave. But I am sure you all will agree that once punishment has been announced, you needed to follow through. Besides, I had absolutely no intention of changing my mind, even if felt I could so so without having any repercussions in regards consistency, I felt a spanking was well earned and needed here.
After her swats, I took a hold of her arm firmly, but not real hard, and guided her over to the couch. While baring her bottom, I continued to scold her on her behavior. That she was 12 yrs old, but was acting like a 2 yr old, and that her 3 yr old sister was setting a better example than herself. And not only that, but she also could have hurt her sister when grabbing her gift like that. She cried harder at that, and wailed she was sorry, and I knew she was, but I felt punishment was still needed. I told her that I loved her, and that I did not want to have to spank her, especially on Christmas, but hopefully this spanking will help her remember next time that this kind of behavior is not acceptable.
I then turned her over my knee, went into my purse and pulled out my hairbrush, and proceeded to spank her soundly. I scolded her somewhat in the beginning, asking her some questions, but I've always scolded mostly before the spanking, and during the spanking I just usually concentrate with my task at hand. In a sense, I remember the whole experience seeming a bit out of place. The loud smacking of my hairbrush and bawling/wailing of my little girl, with "Sleigh Ride" Christmas music playing in the background.
Once I stopped spanked, I just let her cry hard over my lap for a bit, and then asked if she wanted to sit on Mommy's lap and be held (they have never said no). I pulled her close, rocked and comforted her for awhile, letting her know it was all over and that Mommy loves her so much. I told her again I did not want to have to spank her, but I would do so, even on Christmas, if she misbehaved again like that. She just apologized several times, with assurances she wouldn't do so again. And where she had her times of 'tantrums' again after that, they were pretty rare and I never had to spank her again on Christmas.