We've been married for almost 4 years, i'm 30 and my husband 37.
By far i've learned how to be a good wife (emotional challenge especially) I have tried to get used of my husband's behavior and habit so far. It's been good, to think i have all my life for it.
But his way of thinking is the reason i chose to end our marriage.
He asked me to sleep with another guy to fulfill his fantasy of his.
When i said it's a betrayal and a sin, he said it is not if he allow and permit it to happen.
After nights of poisonous whispering i agreed to do it.. in desperate to please him.
One time of touch and grab wasn't enough for him, he wanted to more.
After many times i grew to have feelings with this guy (our friend, whom i chose to be the 'victim' because we know his background well enough)
Then my husband suddenly said it has to stop as he noticed me already has feeling with that guy, and he accused me cheating because i still contacted him by phone messages without him knowing.
I've said that it's an abnormal sexual orientation but my husband doesn't even understand nor believe it. So i think it's impossible to make him understand that his fantasy broke many people's hearts even my dad (single parent since i'm 12 years)
Now there's nothing else to do but to divorce him, my pride as an individual, as a woman, a wife has been destroyed that moment.
Right now the divorce is still on process, we don't have kids so it should be easier.
I'm so thankful given the chance of being single again as i have many things that i wasn't able to do while i'm married =)
The hardest part is trying to erase my feeling with my friend, he's a like pure heroin to me, addictive yet i knew we couldn't have future with this kind of history.
Wonder if anyone ever experienced something like this?

l1127bm l1127bm
31-35, F
1 Response Aug 21, 2014

Alone - Offer Nissim feat. Maya Simantov

I look at you and see
Someone I don't wanna be
And it's taking me too long to realize
I'm better off alone
All the times that you told me lies
And you know that it happend too many times
And its time that I realize
I'm better off alone

I'm leaving you now
I want you to know
I know what I want and I knew all along
I couldn't let go but I'm not gonna stay anymore
So I'm leaving baby
I cannot forget all the pain that I had
All the things that you said
How you're making me mad
And you've made me feel bad all alone
This time I'm moving on

Leaving you don't need you anymore (4x)

I am leaving you this time
I'm not letting you play with my mind
And I moving with my life
This time
I am leaving you behind
All the times that you told me lies
And you know that it happend too many times
Now it's time that I realize
I'm better off alone

I'm leaving you now (living you now)
I want you to know (leaving you now)
I know what I want and I knew all along (I want you to know)
I couldn't let go but i'm not gonna stay anymore (leaving you don't need you anymore)
So I'm leaving baby (I'm leaving baby)
I cannot forget all the pain that I had (I'm leaving baby)
All the things that you said
How you're making me mad (I'm leaving baby)
And you've made me feel bad all alone
It's time I will be alone. (I'm moving on) 

This song really helps me through this time so far, i'm sure it's thr right decision.