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Apparently Its My Fault

The sister in law of my abuser, who allows her children to be babysat by him, told me to just get over it and move on with my life. She also told me that if anything happened to her girls, it was my fault for not speaking up.

Her words were "God for bid if it did happen to my children it might have been to late if it were left to you if you want to be mean about this."


After I contacted her husband , who had been my closest cousin growing up, to talk to him about the abuse I suffered at the hands of his brother I got no response from him, but I did get this email from his wife:

"Please stop harassing my husband! he is not the one who did anything to you. We are sorry something so horrid did happen to you. I hope you can move on with your life and I am sorry you can just throw your family away like that. I am not sure what you have in your mind what family is but that is not my idea of what someone would do."

AntiqueMirrors AntiqueMirrors 26-30 2 Responses Jun 23, 2012

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She is so quick to say "how you threw out the family", but what about what the family did to you!? They refuse to see the obvious. No one wants to think that someone in their family is capable of such a heinous crime, regardless it happened and they shouldn't shun you because they don't want to admit it!



I think you did the right thing to report it, in fact I know you did the right thing.

If this abuse happened while you were a kid then it is the fault of the adults in your life for not providing you with an environment in which you felt you could speak up. I can also see her side a bit too (from what little information you posted) I can see that she might have a hard time even believing what you say is true and if she has never had anything really bad happen in her life then she may be unable to empathize with anyone or she could be just a b!tch. In either case I would just avoid her as much as possible.