All My Reasons For Not Wanting Children

I grew up knowing a lot more than a child should. I'm sure 3rd world countries have it bad, but that level of life is not comparable to that of a 1st world. 3rd world people have 3rd world problems, and 1st world people have theirs. They are separate and different.

Anyway, I think children are precious. Children truly are the future and educating them and looking after them can be fulfilling, but I can do this without being a parent. It doesn't have to be permanent. I prefer it to be temporary if at all. Most people like the idea of creating mini versions of themselves or they want to pass their genes on. But not me. I have a messed up genepool and my father's and mother's genes do not need to be passed on. I'm being considerate of my potential offspring. Not to mention, people are soo interested in the idea of sharing moments with their future children but they don't look at the reality of having children. Some people half-*** mother/fatherhood, and I can't stand that.  Children require a lot of time, patience, and money. Children are an 18+ year commitment. Children require you to compromise IE: you can't come and go freely, you gotta take them everywhere, you have to withhold certain information from them until they're "ready" and be careful of what the media might expose to them. You can't travel freely without taking them along and make sure they're enjoying themselves as well- unless you're rich enough to afford a nanny to watch them at home while you're away. Children need a lot of attention, enrichment, love and more. As they get older, things change as well. As a past nanny with a wide range of experience, I got to experience having children without permanence. People think it's different but it isn't. When I'm left alone to care for these children, I treat them as my own. I bathe them, feed them, play with them, read them bedtime stories and most importantly, I guard them with my life. Can you imagine the pressure I'm under? If any bad crap goes down while their parents are away, it's all on me. Regardless, I have my own reasons beyond all this. I've lived my whole life without real stability and security. When I manage to maintain it, I want to be able to relax and breathe without stressing over " my children". I need to live a little more. I want to travel and go on my adventures and mentor children as I go, but I don't need to make more children. This world has more than enough orphans and neglected children who need love and guidance. If I were to do anything, it's adopt. But like I said, I don't want that kind of responsibility. I am my own responsibility, and that alone is enough with the career I have, and the aspirations I want to fulfill. While I love many things in this world, I hate many as well. I don't want to have a child so that it will grow up in a world like this; a society obsessed with sex, full of sex offenders and discrimination, with slavery still in existence and poverty-ridden. A world that is walking on tight rope, pushing the climate to dysfunction but unwilling to repair the damage or prevent further damage due to greed- where the law system is as good as its people, and some of the people are good for nothing... I used to want children, but I've gone through enough to help me decide I don't want children anymore. With the "joy" of giving birth comes the pains in the process. I don't want any additional pain I can avoid. I am selfish. But at least I admit to it. I have every right to be selfish. I was thrown around  and neglected as a child, and as soon as I could work, I busted my *** to survive. So when I finally find some time to breathe, I want to be able to enjoy myself and show myself the care and love I need to give myself. If I can barely handle myself, how can I take on another life that I brought into this world? So to simply put it, I don't want more responsibilities, this world is not good enough for my children, I'd rather contribute to the existing children in the world who need it, and I want to enjoy my freedom. If I get lucky enough to find a wonderful man to share it with, great. But he is not going to "tie" me down as much as a child would if at all. A man is not "needy" the way a child is, and he would motivate me to keep myself sexy as much and as long as possible- a child would give me the most messed up stretch marks with my genes. I'm not even exaggerating. I sometimes wonder if my mom resents me for "causing"her disgusting stretchmarks. She's gotten a tummy tuck and it wasn't enough to remove all the damage. She ended up tattooing a gnarly image on it so she wouldn't have to see it. :/ And let me add again, I want to be able to have sex freely.

If you want kids, more power to you, if not, more freedom to you!
loveisdeadly loveisdeadly
22-25, F
3 Responses Aug 9, 2010

Someone said you will miss out on a lot of things in life. Well, when you really think about it, EVERYONE will miss out on a lot of things in life. Life is a trade off. Every choice you make narrows your range of future choices. If you don't have kids, you'll miss out on the experience of parenting; on the other hand, if you do have kids, you miss out on having freedom and being able to to what you want when you want. You can't have it all. You have to decide which compromises you're willing to make. Since you have been a nanny, you have had a "taste" of what children are, and what parenting is all about. You know exactly what you're missing. You're making an informed choice. You may want to consider joining the experience group "I Am Happily Childfree". Some of my stories may interest you because I take a realistic approach to what parenting is all about. Take care!

mtcarver: I'm going to miss out? I've been a nanny. I haven't missed out on anything. Every job I have is reassurance that having a child is not "fun" and I get A LOT of gigs in this metropolitan. <br />
<br />
LOL! AnarchistAlex <3

you will miss out on a lot of things in life,