So You Say You Love Me

yet you spend your day playing video games, or skype chatting with my colleauges or some cook who is interested in you

yet your biggest concern, should i get a pneumonia, is that i dont breath on you

yet i may not talk to anyone of your sex while you constantly ignore me trying to sort my life out

yet you are not there when i struggle. i spend sleepless nights alone, sinking deeper in my pains, while you peacefully sleep.

yet i must remain "loyal" to you.

either the real world is twisted, or i am ****** up in this life .. i just want(ed) to be loved.

no love not needed any more.

oh i want to escape, escape this ****.

i want to escape this ignorance, where everyone else is important than me, and yet i must believe that i am love

i want to escape the feeling of agony for failing to solve the easy equation in my HW, and watching a so claimed `girlfriend` to play a *video game* peacefully unaware of my pains

i want to escape the description of how important her quests in the video game are above me, when i need her.

i want to escape her unfinished statements "sean how are ... " (she never completes the *you*) and then runs back to skype to talk to some stranger while i cry alone.

i want to escape the nights when i work alone, and she sleeps, peacefully, never caring to look at me.

i just want to escape this web of misrepresentation of facts

i want to escape this twisted reality.

I wish i could forgive myself for giving up. but i cant. so i cant give up either.
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Dec 15, 2012