My Opinion

I known number of gay men and I have liked all of them.  I find it difficult to believe that they were born to have gay sex. 

My opinon is that homosexuality is a product of environment and also choices. 

One thing that stikes me as common sense is that sex is pavlovian.  I'm referring to Pavlov's dogs which could be conditioned to salivate at a bell.  I think sex is the second most powerful drive after the need to sustain your life and with it comes and tremdous physiological reward.  So whatever is giving you the reward will be something that you will want to return to.  Certain types of sexual behaviour will become addicting for many people.

I have to totally reject the idea that sexual behaviour is not a choice.  You can choose whatever kind of sex you want.  The idea that we cannot choose what sex we engage in and become accustomed to is disempowering dehumanizing.    I believe that we rob ourselves of power and control when we accept the idea that we cannot choose who we love and how we love. 

I have more to say but maybe another day,

cheers!

DesertTruth DesertTruth
26-30, M
6 Responses Mar 28, 2009

I choose to abstain from sex. Activity being a lesbian. I'm also depressed lonely and socially ****** v card carrying nerd. The only things I choose was to not get involved with a man knowing I wouldn't ever be attracted to him and choosing to never interact with other women.
I've paid a hefty price for the second choice and the first hopefully spared great friendships.

Being homosexual is not about sex...you do realize this don't you?...It is about all aspects of the relationship...Homosexual men love to be in relationships with men....period...of course sex is a part of it...but really...do heterosexual people stay in relationships just because the sex is good( of course there are always exceptions) ...you talk here about the sexual aspect but then in the end say "I believe that we rob ourselves of power and control when we accept the idea that we cannot choose who we love and how we love."...when did this post become about love?.... I did not choose to fall in love with the men i have fallen in love with...it was something that happened as a result of things..and i am bisexual as well...I did not choose to be bisexual...I just find myself attracted to women...tremendously...and although i have never had a romantic relationship with a woman I know that I would feel the same for a woman as I do a man...if the right woman were to come along...I have many gay friends...manu bisexual friends...non of which chose to be so..they just were and are...think of you as a straight person...kissing another male...holding his hand... does that not make you cringe in some way ..you are straight...no one gets pressured into being gay or decides that because some woman did a number on them they will now try to be with a man...please...this is not a sensible arguement.

Recently,I came out as bisexual. And a friend told me a good bisexual dating site -- Datebi.com . You may want to check it out. Now I enjoy the bisexual lifestyle.

Yes I don't have good relationship with my father.

i don't know a lot of gay people, but everyone that i do know has had some kind of dysfunctional relationship with their father OR has been deeply hurt by a woman. i think that preferring men stems from an unhealthy defense reflex to emotional hurt they have experienced, which can be worked through with therapy.

I think you are sadly uneducated

I can understand your point of this and also thank you for saying it without trashing homosexuals. I also SOMEWHAT agree with what you say, and here's why... I COULD have sex with a woman, in fact I CHOSE to when I was trying to hide the fact that I love men. I could also choose to ignore the part of me that actually loves and live the rest of my life with a woman always feeling unfulfilled. You could also choose to sleep with someone of the same gender... but it wouldn't be right for you would it? Same thing here. I never chose to be gay, it caused me a LOT of heartache... but I DID choose to live the life I need to lead for me to be whole.