So, I'm 16. Around 6 or 7 months ago I, after a long think about it realised I was gay. I was perfectly happy with who I was. I told some of my friends and they were happy for me and have been very supportive. So a few days ago I decided it was time to let my parents know. I sat them down and I told them. They weren't happy about it, they think I don't know what I'm thinking about they think that since I'm 16 that I shouldn't be making this kind of decision, they told me that I should give girls a try (at this point I should let you know that my parents don't know that I have been out to my friends for quite a while and the only experience that I have had with girls is this one girl that I want out with for about two weeks and we'll just say she was as desperate as I was to find someone). So I told one of my close friends what happened and he told me that in his opinion he thinks that I'm pretty sure that I'm gay but that I shouldn't rule out being bi because I'm so young and that I haven't really had that much experience with girls. Also I should say that it is difficult for me to get involved with attractive girls because of labels (I'm "nerd/hippster" they are "popular") So in other words I don"t know if I should give girls one last try just in case or should I just say I'm bi until I'm 18 or something and come out "again".
gravyboat210 gravyboat210
18-21, M
8 Responses Sep 23, 2012

Don't give yourself a label. Don't even worry about this too much. Relax and try to enjoy your time right now...You don't have to tell any one anything at any time, really...Just get on with your life and don't make it harder for yourself.

I also say you are young to decide such thing. Don’t set yourself any barriers, don't be repulsed by any of them...just live the moment when you’re intimate with a girl, well it’s a girl and vice versa. Along the way you will discover what is

I will say this at your age you have 2 things to concentrate on,one education and 2 having fun,so go do the things a teenager does and leave the sex bit out till your ready,you will know soon enough but you have time so enjoy it!

I'd recommend taking a look at the Kinsey scale. Sexuality is a grey area, and you don't have to be at one end, the other, or smack dab in the middle. I call myself bisexual for brevity's sake, but where 3 is a true bisexual, I'm 2-2.5. You could be a 5 (homosexual with few heterosexual tendencies). It's nothing you have to decide right away, there's no deadline, and it can fluctuate over time. My father, happily married to my mother for thirty years, told me when I came out that he used to be at the same time range I am, but now considers himself a 1 (not a pure heterosexual).

Thanks for the advice guys, hopefully this will help me

you dont need to have a label on your sexuality when you find someone that you are attracted to you will then know their sexuality will be irrelevant to you after that. you dont fall in love with their sexuality you fall in love with the person themself

Don't think about it too much. Just let whatever happens happen. Don't try to force yourself to like either sex just for the sake of figuring out if you're gay/bi or not. I'm sure when you least expect it, some opportunity will come by thats going to make you absoutely sure of what your sexual preferance is. Thats how I learned.

I think labels can be confusing. Just be yourself, do not accept nor assign yourself any label until you know without any doubt that you are exactly that. Just take it slowly and naturally. Do not accept the label of bisexual only because you fear that your personna (nerd, etc.) will limit your ability to attract a female. That is not a good reason. Just be open and experiement with yourself to see which outfit best fits. Perhaps more than one suit will fit you nicely. Perhaps it is an outfit you have yet to see in any window. Just love yourself, accept that whomever - whatever you are is beautiful and worth the time you take to discover yourself. I promise, you will find out soon enough.