The Different One

So, I am a Senior in High School currently and in the past, I've been thought of negatively and made fun of for years and years. I always thought I was different. Back then, I was suffering from a language disability and most of the time I said weird stuff and couldn't really understand what people where saying really well. Right now I am doing alright socially and mentally, but I still think that people make fun of me, and I always have to adjust myself to each person in order for them to "feel satisfied." Put simply, so that they would like me. I always want to be liked and accepted from my peers and all that, and I try way too hard in order to make that happen. My town that I live in has never been the most interesting town to live in or where the best social people come from. Right now I just feel plain pissed because there are so many wrong thoughts and opinions directed toward me and people are judging me incorrectly. I just want to feel freaking peace!!! Leave me alone!!! Another problem I have is flirting. My thoughts on that about me is that the "lame" girls that I flirt with does not technically mean that I am 100% interested in them and no one else. In fact, the chicks that I really want to get with are so freaking hot, and I feel so freaking nervous that nothing ever comes out of my mouth or I say weird stuff (classic love story right there). And because I flirt with all the weird, nerdy, and yet easy to talk to girls, the hot ones just think I am plain weird and are totally not into me. UGH! And it keeps going! Because I have a hard time with flirting and no girlfriend, most people think that I am sexually confused or gay. Nobody trully understands who I am (except for those select few who joined the group "hey maybe he's not so freaking weird after all!"). People change. Get over it. Please adjust. And I don't freaking care what they think of me anymore!!! And now I am truly finding my true self. So there :)

Stewinator879 Stewinator879
18-21, M
Mar 10, 2010