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Why, Because I'm A Control Freak!

   When I was a teenager, it was "Just Say No."  I've even met people who say why not.
    For me it was easy, I hate using anything that makes me feel like less of me.  I don't judge those who do, unless they harm me or mine and then I will hunt you.  But I like having control over who I am, where I go, what I do, and how I do it.  That way if I make a mistake, I can say not only that it was my fault, but I was sober.  So far in my life I can say that.  It doesn't make it easier dealing with the disasters I have caused or the harm I've done through my own negligence, but I can say that it was always me and never 'under the influence.'
     This is a personal choice I made years ago and I have never felt the need to partake.  Now, if I had 'mellowed out' maybe I wouldn't have been a stressed out mess years ago working 60-80 hrs a week, worrying whether my paycheck was going to pay the bills, why did she quit her job, OMG we don't have insurance and she's pregnant, damn that a-hole just cut me off, and why is my bloody boss got me here fixing a printer that rats ate the cables.  But I wouldn't have been me, I would have been someone else.  So, I committed the crime and I paid the time.  Not many can admit it, but I can.  So for those who have chosen a drug free life, good luck, but try and keep laughing.  Don't ever become too serious and lose sight of what is really important.
PrairieDog71 PrairieDog71 41-45, M 2 Responses Jun 13, 2012

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Ahh, a like minded spirit. I always felt the same, but I have to admit, I am ocd which is like a drug in a way, because it makes you do stupid things. :-) I just need to be calmer and more mellow at times, but sometimes I feel like the Energizer Bunny on steroids. Maybe that's why I have High Blood Pressure. :-)

Thanks for sharing. I have never seen the allure of drugs either. Just not my thing to not be able to remember what I am doing and who i am doing it with.