Forgiveness And Forgetting Are One In The Same

Oftentimes, I hear people say that they forgive but they don’t forget. I don’t believe in this idea; I believe that so long as you can remember what bad things people have done to you, you cannot really forgive. Once you have absolutely no care for whatever bad thing someone did to you, once it’s basically absent from your mind, that’s when forgiveness can be present. It’s just my observation, with the biggest case in point being myself. I rarely ever forgive someone, because I rarely ever forget about something. This is also why I rarely ever do harm to someone in any way. I would completely understand if someone never wanted to forgive me for something I did to them no matter how many times I apologized, because if the roles were reversed, I’d do the same. I believe if you’re gonna do something bad to someone, whether intentional or accidental, make sure you’re willing to live the rest of your life without their forgiveness. Maybe it’s because I’m quite severe with stuff like this, but I think forgiveness is thrown about way to easily, and the act deserves a lot more magnitude than what I casually see.
TravelingHelper TravelingHelper
22-25, M
1 Response Aug 11, 2012

WOW.. I have a question.. If God were your parents, they forgave you for trying to kill them .. Would you forgive yourself? Would you spend the rest of your life seeking their forgiveness?

Uhm, well I'm agnostic, and am skeptical about the belief in a god, but for the sake of discussion, I'll answer: I believe if I were to go so far as to try killing my parents (figuratively speaking), I not only wouldn't forgive myself because of the magnitude of my actions, but I probably wouldn't even believe the forgiveness my parents give me, because if I were in their position, I certainly wouldn't forgive them. And I wouldn't spend the rest of my life seeking their forgiveness because I would have abandoned the idea of being forgiven, because I just don't believe it can be done. If I were to do something so horrific, I would have accepted the idea that I would never be forgiven for my actions, and that's why I only make actions that would hurt people in the situations where I can accept that. And if I can't avoid hurting someone, then I just have to calculate which action would do the least amount of damage.

It's impossible to live a life without any regret; anyone who says they've had no regrets in their lifetime is either too stupid to realize or lying & too proud to admit otherwise. Forgiveness is an idea that you can screw up but be pardoned wholly for it. I'm probably being too rigid when I say this, but I don't believe anyone is worth being entirely pardoned for their mistakes, because that's unjust. I believe justice is always having to live with the crimes & mistakes you commit, no matter how small or large. I'm not asking everyone to be hindered by every mistake they've made, but they are scars that should never disappear. You just live your life, and whatever bad decisions you make, you have to live with them; it simply comes with the territory.