Post

Scott Free

Every dog has its day.  I am strong and capable and I will not be defeated by my mistakes.  I made them.  I made my bed.  I lie in it and deal with it everyday.  I was told I was nothing.  I was told I could never survive.  The memories of who I was and how long I survived on my own. After moving out of my parent's home at the age of 20 and maintaining a 4 bedroom home alone.  How could he make such judgements.  It became very clear that I was married to someone who didn't know me at all. 

He doesn't pay child support now and it has been two years since I've recieved even $5.00 from him but the day will come.  I'm looking forward to it.  I'm not looking forward to receiving the money per say but looking forward to his wake up call.  You cannot walk away from your children and pretend they don't exist.  There is a cost for every action.

 

Update:

After two years of waiting he finally paid child support for three months before quitting his job.  He doesn't come and visit his children still.  What a looser! 

 

ichooselife ichooselife 36-40, F 8 Responses Mar 26, 2009

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You are a strong women and after reading this.That is pathetic..to not take responsibility for his children.Children are a blessing,you really are a Angel with wings..hugs much love cAnDy...Sometimes I just get so mad at jerks honey..You are beautiful and your children...and you have been through so much.I believe you will be rewarded if not in this life the next!And your children will flourish in your arms..You are a positive light!

I'm not going to stress myself. I was beginning to see him in a different light....thinking...wow, he's really turned his life around now and wants to live life as a decent human being...nah...I couldn't have been more wrong.



I've supported my children without him for the past four years with little or no help from him....not much has changed. It is disappointing because the children are hurt when they can't see him. He doesn't have the time for his own seeds. I'm the one that dries away the tears when they are looking for him and he doesn't show. I'm the one that saves my money for things they've earned. I give the allowances, buy the Christmas toys, sews the Halloween costumes and he is missing out because I'm seeing wonderful human beings blooming.

Yes he is a lloser. You deserve so much better. Hell have to pay in a big lump sum when they catch up to him-hugs

I can't believe this woman he married believes she's caught herself a good man. People often are so lonely and overcome with low self-esteem, they will sell their souls for companionship. Its not just men either. Women enable this type of behavior. I don't know either they forget or refuse to acknowledge how costly it is to raise a child. Hell, its difficult in this recession to provide a roof over your own head let alone being responsible for another human being. Its selfishness at in its deepest diseased state.



I've been all over the net reading stories about women and men who conceive children with deadbeats. The men have all type of excuses. They claim they never had a choice in whether or not the child was born (promoting abortion) and now they are expected to pay for the woman's choice. This is the biggest load of crap for an excuse I've heard.



Everyone has a choice from the start (most times) where sex is concerned. There are male contraceptives, female contraceptives. If a man doesn't ever want children he can be snipped ya know. That is the only guaranteed method. But they didn't. The child is here, they didn't ask to be here but they are. In my case I was married and we decided to have children. Now the bastard is backing out when the children are 7 & 8? Wtf????





Sad thing is your ex really thinks he's hurting you by not giving you money. But he's hurting his own flesh and blood by not providing a means of survival. He's casting them to the wolves. Its really sad and my heart goes out to you on this one. Not because your children are going to suffer financially, because I don't believe they will.



Many of us are in the same boat. We pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and do what needs to be done. This looser you speak of will never win in court. He will never have anything in life that is fulfilling. He has cursed himself and his life in its entirety. He doesn't have a leg to stand on.



Regardless of whether he works or doesn't, the child support will accrue. He's either going to pay it or go to jail in my state. I don't know about your state laws but, I hope it is the same in yours.



Deadbeat Dads are as bad as pedophiles.

Our judicial system sucks regarding child support! My ex is a lazy a$$ loser. He never worked when we were married and chooses not to work and is on his 5th wife ( I was number 3). There is nothing physically wrong with him other that he thinks everyone 'owes' him something. Once again, I was drug into court to reduce his child support because him and the new wife are struggling. And they have no children, I told him instead of constantly taking from his daughter he needs to get off his a$$ and find a job. But as usual this is his easy way out. He reduced it back in 2007 and there is a law in NC that you cannot modify but one time every 3 yrs. His paperwork was incorrectly filled out so the judge threw it out. And had the nerve to call me a ***** and he would go file it again. His wife was standing there, now I ask you what kind of woman supports this type behavior? I dont know, and I dont care. I have full custody and I allow her to see him. I have never denied visitation. I just hope one day it all comes crashing down around him and I am there to watch every minute of it!!!

I have two children and one teen (18).

yes, I still let him see our children. I just don't understand how he doesn't realize they need financial support as well.



I'm so saddened at how one sided the judicial system is toward men. I found a lot of discrepancies that leave the child at a loss of a wonderful father and the father at a complete loss in being involved with their child(ren). Its completely unfair and I sympathize with you 100%

I agree with you a parent should pay support for a child. But I have the other side of that problem. My ex-wife hooked up with some guy. Then started moving around so much it was impossible to find my son. I found them and took her back to court to see if I could get the court to atleast make her tell me where she was so I could see my son. The court agreed with me that she needed to let me see my son. Well I paid child support for 11 years after that and never saw or even know where my son is. So I stopped paying hoping that the state wherever she is would come after me. They never did. Thinking that maybe they had a nation wide system setup I called and turned myself in. That didn't work either. So now it has been 13years 5 months since the last I held my son. I never understood or even now understand why. She herself said I would do her much better than she has done me. The court will find me make me pay but will not do the same for me. That is so not right. I just don't get it. I hope that if you are allowing him to she his kids and he is either not seeing them by choice or is just not paying for support. I hope you fry his butt.