About To Loose A Hard Earned License

Hi. I am so happy this group exist. Particularly today.

I am 28 and I never wanted to drive. The same as everybody, my dad thought this was a boys' thing, mom never drove... At age 19 I did not have a license but my mother was really sick and my father had to drive her all the time to doctors appointments.. My brother was 17 so I decided to go for it and help out my family.

I had never driven a car before so it took me months of classes and 3 attempts to pass. After the first 2 I wondered if I was experiencing a panic attack ( I was studying psychology then) On the third one my driver instructor talked to the examiner and he kind of took easy with me.... I got my Brazilian drivers license... finally.

It took me another 6 months driving with friends and family to really get confident and even after my father had given me a car I was still always requesting friends to be "supervising me".

Eventually I got better and better and even not being the best I have a pretty good driving history. I went to many different states, the beach and the country side.... Driving a car gave me a lot.... And I was thankful and happy for that.

However, life changes. 3 years ago I decided to come to Australia and study English. I end up falling in love for a Croatian boy and left Brazil for good. I did not drive in the first year but later my (now) husband thought me how to drive on the other side of the road, change gears with the left hand and I dare say that I learned pretty fast. 2 months later I found a job in a community center where part of my functions are driving kids to school and activities and their mothers to appointments, grocery shopping etc. This is a small part of the job but it is important and I really don't mind.

I have been doing this for 2 years and some women just want me driving them as they say I am very careful and don't speed. During this period I have been driving under an international license and everything was ok but this license is about to expire, next Wednesday really and I am terrified.

I even took 2 driving classes and the instructor said that I was very good but at the first exam I was just so nervous I thought I would die.. The same panic attack feeling. Today I had the second one and I did even worse.. Shaky, not paying attention on the road... added to their slight racism made clear by comments and jokes related to my accent and here we go.... 2 fails in a week. I have one more test booked next Tuesday but I have no hope and I know I will be freaking out. This means I will end up loosing my job or at least having hours cut and God knows for how long... I have no hope of taking this license in the next millennium.... and I am a good driver...

It is been pretty **** to be around me these last 2 weeks. I am definitely not in a good mood and my friends try their best but all they can come up with is: 'don't forget your seatbelt" or "do your shoulder checks" or "stop at the stop sign"... really???? Don't you think if I was not doing that I would already have lost my license by now?????

I don't need driving lessons I need Valium.... Well, or any similar really...

I will keep you posted.... Any suggestions are welcome.

nsirinx nsirinx
26-30, F
Feb 12, 2010