Awkward Silence

I just started college and, as everyone knows, first weeks of college are the times to meet hundreds of new people. Yet I stand in my room by myself. Its overwhelming, maybe because I came looking for something more than education. I'm disappointed in everything, specially myself. I came here running away from a life I hated. I barely had friends, and most of them were in a relationship. My family made things worse and I'm not someone who talks a lot. I admit it and I see that's my major problem. I notice now every single time I meet someone it always ends in the awkward silence. I can get by the basic introduction but after that there's just nothing to talk about. I don't know what to do honestly. College is all about socializing but how do you find something interesting to say? I've tried many times...but the conversation never flows naturally. Even with talkative persons. I eat in silence while everybody else just talks. Is it that weird to just eat without saying a word? I found that people don't find me interesting enough. I just never have anything to say and if I do is something stupid or silly. I don't know what to do, especially because of all the sacrifices I made. I don't want to regret being here but I feel like running away, again! I'm desperate, I'm on the verge of breaking down so bad. And the worst part, I don't know where to go, where to cry. I feel alone as always. Here I am, siting in my dorm, while everybody else is outside.
tatyana16 tatyana16
18-21, F
1 Response Sep 5, 2012

I don't know if you'r still in school but I am a freshman now and I don't think I could explain how I feel any better