How To Love?

I don't know how to love. A statement so simple yet oddly misunderstood when attempting to gain an empathetic connection. I guess I should make it a little more discreet: I don't know how to love someone romantically. That statement is waaay more accurate. I can love my family, my friends and even my pets to great emotion but I just can't seem to feel the same compulsion to love another person in terms of commitment and intimacy. Often I feel like an alien among my friends who've all aquired love interests (time again) while I, as always, have remained the same single me. It's like I'm torn, yearning for that affection they so clearly display yet unknowing quite how to experiance it. Perhaps I'm to much of a romantic, or too picky, to allow myself the time to grow a level of fondness for someone else. A more likely argument is that I'm maybe afraid of being trapped in an engaugement full of fights and loathing like I've seen countless times among so many couples allegedly 'in love'. Why would I want to burden myself with such commitment? It seems so many relationships have fallen that I often wonder if there are any truly functional ones out there? Again I come to the same crossroads as before: I want and fear that relationship. So what to do then?


My only answer so far is to try and find someone and stick with them even when I feel like it will never work out. Perhaps if I learn to give them a chance to show me they are worth my affection, I can give myself a chance to express it?

KibblesNBits KibblesNBits
26-30, F
4 Responses Feb 22, 2010

I feel EXACTLY the same way; 47 and i've never been "in love" and wonder if I ever will, can, want to, etc. Thanks for sharing.

I have tried to stay with someone despite the odds. I don't feel love; I can't. And it doesn't work. Be alone.

me too, and its causing me a great deal of problems

Very well put. I actually have the same problem.