I Seem Confident But I'm Scared

With so much negativity and ill-will, I feel like I'm ill-prepared for what this world may bring me.  The chaos and havoc and bloodshed feels like it's not too far from my doorstep, and I hate being unprepared.  It scares the hell out of me to be helpless and defenseless.  What if I lose my job?  What do I have to fall back on?  Nothing really, and I refuse to go back home because that feels like I have given up.  I will fight and kill to protect what I have, but what if I have nothing and am at the end of my rope with no job, no money, no truck, and I don't want to be stuck home with my parents again if they're still alive by the age this happens?  Well, frankly, I couldn't tell you what would happen.  I have no idea.  Or am I just being ridiculous and paranoid?

filthydieseltech filthydieseltech
22-25, F
3 Responses Feb 13, 2010

:) Thanks y'all.

It can be over whelming at times, hang in there! Regardless of what may happen in your life, you will not only survive, but you will some how come out better. As rough as it seems, remember you always have your friends on EP, we love you and support ou no matter what happens.

Oy, girl, what's going on with you? Are you okay, and i'm sorry i didn't pick up earlier on your sadness. you are so strong, and beautiful, and oh, so smart, and this is how i see you. <br />