I Don't Know What Is Going On With Me

I don't know why and how it happened in my life. I am married and my husband loves me although we have not similar habits. I usually work with my teammates by emails since we  work in different states, every year we have meeting in FL, last year when I went to meeting I just want to see one person whom I communicate all the time and he helped me on different issues of work, when I saw him and  he realized that's me , he was very happy and we sit and start talking, i will never forget his eyes, suddenly he realized the presence of my husband and I confirmed than he become cautious but since I lost my mind , during three days meeting we were keep looking at each other wherever we go and I just want to talk to him and he too but he was  little serious.after meeting I just want to work with him , wait for his email, he did not say anything about love neither me but he knows I have feelings for him, I admire him about his hard work and profession , I just want to talk to him, some time I got scare if he think i am too much but he email that he is not mad with smiling face. This year when I met him in meeting , I wasso happy to see him and wanted to talk to him , i explained little without saying that i have feelings for you but that always want to talk to you and it makes me happy, he reply that he want to make me happy. I hate my self sometime , why I am in this position but its not my control, I am always thinking about him, I don;t know what happened to me.





since than.. i don't know if I am wrong, I don't want be cheater  

36-40, F
1 Response Mar 5, 2010

I also love my husband and I will never forgive myself if I will cheated on him. Person whom I like , is also married , i never talked about his personal life, I only met him twice but work everyday just by emails or sometime on phone. Is it true that maybe I have some emptiness in my marriage, may be because me and my husband have not similar habits, I don't know why just that man came in my life and I fell in love with him , I never ever thought about this. I see so many people are always interseted about me and they know I am married but I never have feeling for anybody, i never think about anybody in my life beside my husband, I just want that man in my life may be as a best friend or speical person or anyway, all I know I cannot forget him, he become a part of my inside.