Love Is Very...mysterious...in a Sucky Way.

So a couple days ago I realized that I had jumped into a new relationship too quickly...again. Even though the person was just what I wanted. I still didn't want it. in the end. I guess maybe it was because he was too clingly at the end. I hate that. I need my space. Although it was nice at the time. I haven't had that much attention in quite a while. But I knew I would get sick of it soon. He was really cool though, I guess. I don't know. maybe I'm just desparate. At first I thought he was going to really amazing. You know? Because I don't... It's so hard to know who I will like. (considering I have only fallen in love once...I think) I guess I feel confident around the people that I don't really love. and then I become this weirdo freak that can't do anything right, when I'm around the person I love. UGH!!! love sucks. It hase never worked out for me. NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:( It's not fair. It makes me not want to try. And I know I'm not very old at all. In fact I am quite young, but I have had a lot of experience with various scenerios. I can name 3 failed relationships, a couple of flings, Being on all  sides of an affair (cheater, cheated, and the other guy), falling in love, having someone's love confessed to me...more times than I can count on my hands, and people find me attractive from people ages 36 to 8. And this all in the last year. I'm ready to be with someone that I can love, and someone that will love me. I'm sick of all this ****. It's all blurry, and ambiguous. I just want to find someone who I can be happy with. DAMMIT!!! I jump into every new oppotunity, and then find out something, and want to jump back out. why is love so destructive?

wycomper wycomper
26-30, M
1 Response Jan 28, 2007