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Trapped

I have been fighting with myself again. In 2005 I felt the same way. Lost, trapped. I made the decision to go back to school – and really do it. I had nothing to loose, my job sucked, my relationship… crash and burn. I was ready to reinvent myself. I went back to school full time – far from “home” I did everything that I had always wanted. Prove to myself that I was more than I could have ever imagined. I made the deans list, met the most amazing girl and just a few short years later graduated with high honors. That was one of the best times of my life. It has been nearly a year since that day. And every day since then I have been saying… “I don’t know what to do with my life…” After school I went back to work as a butcher, just to make some change to get by on while I went job hunting. Spring is over, no job. Summer is over, no job. I thought “don’t get yourself down; this happens to all new grads.” For a competitive edge I spend 2 months “keeping my mind sharp” and became certified in two technician fields. Winter is over, no job. I applied to graduate school and was accepted. I do not like grad school… I don’t think I am going to stay… why bother? I have had the same job since I was 16. After all my effort and education, is this really my life to be? Sometimes I feel like packing a bag and running away from this. I don’t understand why I am trapped.
somethingmissing somethingmissing 26-30, M 3 Responses Apr 17, 2008

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You said yourself that the first time this happened you got to a point where you were fed up with your life, pushed yourself to change it, and achieved more than you could ever imagine. That tells me that you have the strength to persevere, and I don't know you...but I feel like you will. =)

You said yourself that the first time this happened you got to a point where you were fed up with your life, pushed yourself to change it, and achieved more than you could ever imagine. That tells me that you have the strength to persevere, and I don't know you...but I feel like you will. =)

Hang in there. I know it sucks right now. And I know it wont be much better for me when I graduate school. But for your own sake as well as for the sake of other future college grads, hang in there and you will find your dream job. Just out of curiosity, have you looked in other states for your career of choice? I know some students do not want to leave a certain area which is often the reason they never find the jobs when they graduate, because they are not willing to go to where the jobs are. I am not implying thats your case, I am just tossing out an option. In any case, I have the utmost faith in you and I havent even met you. I need to have faith in you. Because if I cant have faith in people like you then I cant have faith in myself. My field is film making...finding a job for me after college is going to require a LOT of starving... So please.... you can do this!