I Dont Know What to Do
4 years ago, my dad left me and my mum. He moved to another country across the world, remarried, and had kids - all without our approval or knowledge. It was a terrible thing to do and we suffered from it..both financially and emotionally. Even today i get upset when i think about him and what he did. I miss the way he used to be..not the person he changed into. At first, i used to talk to him occasionally, but now i have completely lost contact. My mum speaks to him once in a while (financial reasons). Recently when she called him, she told me that he was asking about me and wants me to talk to him. But i don't know how to talk to him after all that's happened. Would you? What's more, we're going to the country he's in for a holiday this summer - my mum's family lives there and we want to visit them, not my dad. But also during that phone call, my dad said that he would like to see me when we go there. I just don't want to see him though! I don't hate him, its because its so upsetting and if i visited him all i would do is cry and then i would have to leave him all over again and probably wouldn't see him for another couple of years. My mum said that it's up to me, because she wouldn't mind seeing him herself. She thinks that he has realised his mistake and feels guilty about it. There is a part of me that wants to see him, but then a big part of me that doesn't. I would feel bad if i didn't visit him when i am so close, but i think i would feel worse if i did go to see him. I am torn between taking the chance to see my dad once again or moving on and preventing myself from becoming even more upset..i wish someone would tell me what to do!
