What Should I Do?

So I have this friend, who a year ago I thought was a cute girl, funny, someone I could be comfortable with. That's how I still think of her but things have changed. I've moved to a different area and can't contact that particular friend as much/ There's online messaging, I used to message her all the time but stopped because I was the one who was always messaging. After I stopped I noticed she didn't even bother to message me from time to time.

Then a close friend of mine told me that she actually dislikes me. I felt so hurt, I wasn't angry because it was her decision to not like me. I was hurt because she never told me and just pretended. All those happy times, those laughs, those conversations. Were all of them fake? I'm sure there were times where we enjoyed each others company but I don't know...

Another close friend of mine gave told me about the 'fake' friends personal account where she says everything she feels. So I decided to conduct an experiment, when she was online I messaged her several times (because she wouldn't reply...even though she was online), then I looked at her account site and she said "**** off, how can she not get it?". When she posted that, everything was confirmed. She didn't like me.

Recently another close friend of mine invited me to hang out with the group, to catch up. She them told me that my 'fake' friend said "Can't she come another time? It's gonna be awkward and stuff. She's gonna embarrass us in public" (I'm weird when I'm with people who I believe I am close with, I guess she doesn't like 'me') I'm still hurt that she's still pretending. What should I do? I dislike what she's doing but I don't hate her.

I don't want to confront her because I want HER to tell me she doesn't want to be my friend. I've told her a BILLION times that if she ever has anything against me or doesn't want to be my friend then just say so. I'm not the type to get upset. But of course, it's not that easy to just tell the person. I also don't want to confront her because it may cause conflict with my other friends creating a war.

Ever since finding her account and what she posts, I've seen a TOTALLY different side of her. I never knew she self-harmed, cried herself to sleep, and was depressed. I don't want to make her even more upset because of my selfishness to confront her. She constantly posts that she none of her friends cared for her. I CARED FOR HER. If not, I would've outcasted her ages ago. She says 'i love you' to online friends she's never even met, but I guess it's easier to talk to people that isn't with you everyday because they won't get involved in your problems. The real life friends are the ones that cause the problems.

I don't know what I should do. Should I confront her? Should I wait for her to confront me...but she will never do it. She'll probably use the tactic of 'drifting away' from each other. Should I just leave it? I don't know what to do...
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Oct 30, 2012