I've been chatting with this girl for like a year, noticed that I really like her personality, and she even starts to fall in love with me..

She's in Canada and I'm in NewYork and I think we probably wouldn't have the chance to meet, so one day I told her to stop it, and I'm just her online friend, but she said she won't.

Ok, days after I lied to her that I have a girlfriend so I think she could stop thinking about me, or just hate me or block me, but she didn't.

I've also tried to talk her out like Hey don't waste your precious time on me cuz we probably wont be together, but shes just having that mind that we will meet someday in the future...!

I don't know what to do now, i really dont want to hurt her feelings, i rather let her to hate me for the rest of her life but i dont want to hurt her.


Feeling regret of accepting her friend request in the beginning..
deleted deleted
26-30
3 Responses Sep 1, 2014

Aw that so sweet

Hey James, I understand that you don't want to hurt her feelings and that's considerate of you. However, I think that the only way for you to get through to her is to be as blunt as possible. Not blunt in a rude way, but be as straightforward as possible. If she feels a little hurt because of the way you put it, then it worked. If she still has the mindset that you two will meet in the future and be together, then you weren't straightforward enough. Good luck :-)

That could very well be the case, that she's manipulating you I mean. What if you just stopped contacting her altogether? I've actually done this where I told the person exactly why I don't want to talk to them anymore and then I leave it at that. I don't contact them in any way, shape or form and the person eventually stops contact as well. On top of that, they have the benefit of having closure over the situation because you technically told the person why you don't want to talk to them anymore (whether they choose to accept that at the time or not). I would try no contact.

She'll have to get over you if you stop contacting her. Sounds like she may have some problems, and you sound mature and reasonable. May not have worked even if you were closer. It's hard to hurt someone we care about, yet even more hurtful to be untrue to ourselves.

If you've already explained your point of view, and are ready to be completely done with it, then yes. Commence ignore. It's not easy but it's worth it because that type of person will not stop otherwise.