Splitting Me

You know how Bruce Wayne is Batman and Peter Parker is Spiderman? How they go out and be someone else and keep it all organized between the two egos? I sort of feel I have a split of two lives but not exactly as easy and organized as putting on a spandex outfit and go out crime fighting. No I'm pretty damn sure I don't have a real mental issue, not bi-polar, not split personality. I just waver between two very different mindsets, one is the more natural one I probably should be, the other one I don't think I could ever aspire to. Let's just say for simplicity sake there's "Andrew" he's just sort of a normal straight guy, a bit of an introvert and sometimes timid guy. He tends to keep to himself and works a lot on a few hobbies like drawing, writing, and guitar. On the other hand though there's "Amy", she's a bit of a clingy girl who gets lonely sort of quickly and tends to be more of a day dreamer. The problem is Used to play a secret life to appease both sides but after it got more desperate and harder I gave up on the latter, Amy. So now I live out the more normal way I should but now and then slowly revert back and have fever pitches of the Amy side. It's so confusing and makes me feel bad. I don't really want to go full-fledged into this other persona, I would lose most of what I have now, take a chunk out of my life transitioning, and most likely be alienated by friends and family. But as the normal Andrew I don't really go far and feel pretty down. I keep wantig to flirt with the other side and being the other person. But the few times I take my chances full into that it makes me depressed afterwards.
I feel I am trying to break out into two people at the same time. It's crazy! I really don't know who I am! Either side of this messed up coin isn't looking all too good.