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I Don't Know Who I Am Anymore

Was I Ever Real?

By: SirensEcho
Written on November 9th, 2012
Everything I've done seems to only been done because of my consuming need for approval. The bits that make me, were never really me. Just pieces others found appealing. So I latched onto this idea. This ideal. That if I be these things. If I like these things. People will want me around. People will like me. People will never go away.I tried so hard to be what others wanted without even realizing it. Without realizing that after so long that there is nothing here beneath the layers of borrowed personalities. Nothing but a sad girl who doesn't want to be alone. Who wants desperately to be approved of. I don't know who I am. Underneath this. How can I love myself when I am a stranger to myself? Where does the borrowed likes and dislikes end and the real me begin? Who am I?
By: SirensEcho
Age: 18-21 , Female
193 people have read this story

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2 responses
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    Ezmarelda
    Ezmarelda

    It's really easy to get lost in things, more specifically negative things in our lives. I think that you just need to be brave enough to embrace yourself. It sounds like you have lost your true self in the midst of trying to find what you thought you wanted but the good thing is you realize your situation. Wanting to know is an awesome thing because it means that you are doing something positive instead of destructive. For me I'm very good at lying to myself and denying what I am, so stop lying to yourself and dig deep within to figure out what your REALLY like because your in there somewhere and I think we as humans underestimate the power of ourselves sometimes.

    Nov 16, 2012
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    FashionQueen86
    FashionQueen86

    Then don't be a stranger to yourself. Perhaps, that's the biggest problem here. You were so busy trying to please and impress others by being something you're not and that only brings more foreignness into your life. The best thing you can ever do for yourself and stand by who you really are and allow the right people to come into your life and accept you for the way you are without you making newer adjustments or changing for them. At the end of the day they wouldn't notice a thing, but you're always with yourself at the end of the day and you're stuck with this obligation to be something different.

    I don't think there is ever a problem with wanting to be around people. You may as well becuase this world is totally populated with humans in every corner. However, you can't be afraid to be alone either. Sometimes it's just that way, and you have to learn to adapt to it. But it's not forever. Our problems are temporary, that's if we allow it to be and not make ourselves stretch it out to an even bigger problem.

    Nov 10, 2012
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