If Only?

I am a 17-year old girl who studies abroad in China. I am graduating this Summer and have been accepted to Peking University. I should be happy having all I have, but I really am not. I feel like choosing China was a mistake. Coming to China was a mistake. Coming to this school was a mistake. I really don't feel satisfied with myself. I am just an average student who got so lucky that she has the chance to get admitted to a school most of Chinese students have never even dream of going.

I want to go to the US instead. I want to do a part time job so I don't have to use my parents' money as much as I do now. I wanted to have an unforgettable high school life. I want those.

I am still trying to browse some colleges in America and I am starting to consider repeating my last year of high school in the US. If only I had more time before this. I regret that my school requires us to attend class from 7 in the morning to 9 at night. I regret that I did not insist on keeping my laptop to browse more universities when they take my laptop away. I regret that I haven't found a nice university for me during this past weekends.

I don't know what kind of help I need... Thank you for reading my story anyways. I would be really grateful if anyone can offer me any advice at all.
Dstea Dstea
18-21, F
1 Response May 13, 2012

I would go the US then for you last year of high school and try to to apply to some American Universities and while your hear tour as many colleges as you can. When looking for a college you need to find one that is gonna feel like your home away from home and also academically elite in the field which you would like to go into. Oh, and by the way your far from average if you go accepted int Peking University and you should be proud of that accomplishment :)

Hi there, i really appreciate your reply :)
I've decided to attend Peking university anyway, but i'm hoping i could get accepted to some universities in the states that i'm interested in (maybe after my second year,if i still feel uncomfortable that is). Now i'm going to do my best and enjoy what i have now to the fullest and be grateful. i should say i'm lucky that i'm majoring in the field i love too :D

now *hug* thank you thank you for listening

Your Welcome! I am gald you are taking advantage of the great oppurtunity and hopefully you are happy and enjoy the university. Ah, you are so lucky that you have found your passion it takes most people (me lolz) ages to decided on what they truely want to study.