I Get The Mental Picture Of Everyone Having Snipers WHILE I Eat In Any Restaurant

i am eatin in a hotel ... have my burger , fries n coke..... jus wen i think i can gobble it all up .... i seee people all around me in adjacent tables ..... okay so should i eat like this or like that ... small bites or big ones .... should i take bite from my burger and fires at the same tym or should have them separatly ... wen i sip ma coke ... i shld make it a point that i dun make wierd suckin noises  and a million"  shld i's "flood my mind and tats wen the waiter comes from no whr and scares the hell outta me " sir shld i get u anything else?"  
and THE  person inside me screams " I WANT SCREEN GAURDS AROUND ME TILL I FINISH MY MEAL OR I AM GONNA SUE UUUUUUUUUUU"