I Hate It!!!

I don't know what it is but I just hate eating in public. I always think people are scrutinising the way I eat and laughing at me, I know it's stupid - I don't eat like a caveman or anything, don't make noise's and don't make a mess. When I first met my husband it took me ages to eat infront of him. We arranged to spend two weeks together about 3months into our relationship, a week in his hometown and a week in mine. Of course I couldn't eat, he offered to leave the room but  all I managed was a slice of toast the whole time I was there. By the end of the week I was shaking so bad that I had to hide in his car and have a packet of crisps. When we got back to my house and I felt more relaxed I cooked us a meal and we sat in the dark eating lol. Then a few days later we went out and I was drunk so thought stuff it, I'll have some chips. Soon after that I relaxed and ate more around him but even when we first moved in together I found it hard. It's not just him though, in my last job it took me 6months before I would eat in work. I'd be sat there all day starving until I finally plucked up the courage to eat. Then I made the huge mistake of telling my colleagues how much I hated being watched while I eat. I'd be sat there and I'd just take a bite of a sandwich and some one would look over and say "are you enjoying that?" I'd have to go to the toilet and spit it out, usually I'd end up throwing the rest of my food away. I am getting better now but I still feel uncomfortable eating at functions where you all have to sit together to eat like weddings and things.
31-35, F
6 Responses Sep 20, 2007

Ewwww Meggers!! Don't offer me any thanks, yuck!! I'm having an Indian take away tonight, now thats what I call proper food!!!

Its like carrot cake YUCK!!! WHy oh why would someone put carrots in a cake - who thought to do that??!! and potato cakes bleurgh!! Whatever next broccoli and cabbage cakes????

so I been told - but ewww, cheese and cake together lol!!

wow. yeah, beatroot, radish, salmoln all sounds nasty,<br />
but cheesecake is REALLY GOOD!!!

crisps are potato chips<br />
I've always had a hang up about food - my dinner lately told me a couple of years ago that when I was like four or five I would always smell my food and if it smelt funny I wouldnt touch it lol!! I think I'm getting worse as I get older. I have a HUGE list of things I will not eat, or even try!! eg beetroot, tuna, sweetcorn, baked beans, peas, radish, cabbage, cheesecake, salmon, custard - its an endless list!!!

aww.........<br />
ok questions for you:<br />
were you like this when you were younger?<br />
if so what did you do for lunch?<br />
and what the heck are crisps?<br />
and seriously eating is a natural part of life so enjoy filling your face. and i'm sooo glad you're becoming more comfortable with the idea of it.