Husband's Family Sucks

My father died a year and a half ago. He was an astronomy buff who had always wanted to see a total eclipse. He died before getting the chance. So I thought I am an astronomy buff too, why not go to see the longest eclipse of this century in China? I had never been on a vacation outside of my home country and this was huge. My husband and I never even had a honeymoon. After 26 years of being together it was finally time for us to do something nice for ourselves. Also it was a trip as a small homage to my Dad.

My husband had always wanted to take his mother on a vacation. I didn't want her to come to China with us, but unfortunately my husband wouldn't go unless I agreed for her to come with us. I saved every penny I had for a year. I saved $15,000 so we could go on a much more luxurious trip because of my elderly mother in law. We even had to chip in $2500 to cover part of her trip because it was too expensive for her. Not happy about that, but it was so important to my husband I just let it go.

July of this year we left for a 3 week vacation throughout China. It was amazing and much better than I ever thought it would be. She was completely rude the entire time, interrupting people, not listening to anything the guides were telling us, and just being generally stupid. It was embarassing for both my husband and myself. Embarassing but whatever, I could get past that. Until she pulled her next trick...

We were at the gate in the Beijing airport waiting to board our plane home. We got up to get in line and security swooped down on us asking about a wallet. They went through our luggage and wouldn't let us board our plane. I asked what was wrong and was told that my mother in law had stolen a wallet going through security.

We underwent 40 hours of interogation. I was fingerprinted and a mug shot was taken. I have never even been in police car/station/cell back home so to go through this in China was very overwhelming. She denied she had done anything wrong even though she had given my husband $3000 of the $5000 Hong Kong dollars she had taken out of the wallet. She disposed of the id in the garbage can and put the wallet into her neck pouch. Which is exactly where they found it on her person. She claimed it was hers. She told us she had stashed the money in her luggage before we left home so we wouldn't get stranded anywhere.

Then they let my husband & I go. We had to stay in Beijing for an extra 3 days at a cost of about $1000. Then we had to buy new plane tickets because they won't honor them if you miss your plane due to a crime. That cost $3200. Not to mention the pain my husband had to endure because we had to leave her behind. I had never seen my husband cry before. I didn't like it.

I fought for her release for 3 months. She returned to say that she wasn't guilty, she only played Finders Keepers. She is not a thief. She believes that nothing was done for her except what China did. Not understanding that this little stunt has cost my husband & I over $6500. Not to mention the time I spent emailing and calling. Trying to find out legal information without hiring a lawyer. Very trying.

All she has to say for herself is 'I'm sorry". Well, she ruined the first trip my husband & I have ever gone on. Cost us thousands of dollars. Insulted me by telling the embassy that I wouldn't be able to handle what had to be done but if it wasn't for me she would still be sitting in prison. I can barely put into words how sick and disappointing this action was. My memory of my Father was why I was there, she even said that was stupid to tell people we came for the eclipse. No one goes that far just for an eclipse. Well I did. 

My husband has two other useless siblings who did nothing. One can't hold a job, and the other is crazy. We forced the one who doesn't work to pay the utilities while she was away (he lives there and is 39 yrs old) and she thought that he should be congratulated for doing so. I am speechless. My family had to help us out because otherwise we would have been alone. I am so angry that she refuses to take responsibility for her actions. I just want my money back and all of them out of my life. I HATE HER.

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2 Responses Nov 5, 2009

That is awful. I would feel the same way you do. She had to have known how important that trip was to you both, and she not only ruined it but complained as well. Bless you for STILL taking the time and energy to get her out of prison. Did your husband help you research? He should have considering he wanted to take her.

I hate my husband's family too. They are deaf, lazy, did dugs, trying to use my husband and me all the time. His brother doesn't care if we get divorce because i do not like him. What a rude people!!! He thinks he comes over to see my husband is showing his love.Not true. I can feel nothing but using my husband!! Anyway, i can not accept that also.<br />
I am sorry you have to deal with such a terrible mother in law...