I Love Him, But I'm Not In Love With Him

I married my husband of almost 5 years now for the sake of my baby daughter back then.  Her father and I got separated back in 2003 (2 months after she was born).  I realized she couldn't grow up in an environment were there was cheating, arguing, and mistreatment.  I decided to divorce her father...as we got separated my current husband found out (he and I knew each other one year before my separation with my ex) and in a sense too advantage of my weakness, depression, sadness.  He stayed with me all the way thru, and grew to love my daughter. They have a great father-daughter relationship.  We got married as soon as my divorce was final. We have a 2 year-old girl.  My ex-husband now would like to be involved in my oldest daughter's life.  When I spoke to my ex-husband I realized how much we both get along and we could have a nice conversation.  I feel, I still have feelings towards my ex-husband.  I see at my current husband more like a brother.  I was not in love with him when I married him.  I married him for my daughter.  I gave him a child of his own blod because he wanted one.  I don't want to sound selfish, but I feel I've done everything for a lot of people.  Now I feel have to do things for myself.......I just want to be alone.

ursescot ursescot
31-35, F
1 Response Oct 12, 2009

Then maybe you should try being alone, since its what you truly want. Good luck :)