Church Emergency

 So, I was in Mexico. My friend Mariana had dragged us half-way across the country in her mom's SUV to Zumpango so that she could see her ex-boyfriend Hugo. He was a really nice guy and showed us around the city square.

Mariana pointed out a little snack stand and suggested that we get something to eat. My stomach was feeling kinda not so happy (I tried really hard to avoid drinking the tap water, but somehow I still ended up "sick" pretty much every day). I said, no thanks. I'm not hungry, I really couldn't eat anything right now.

"Noooo!" Mariana laughed, looking at me like I was quite insane. "This is not food!"

Okay, fine. I conceded.

We each bought a corn-on-the-cob-on-a-stick-with-chili-powder-and-mayonnaise-on-top and sat around the stone center park thingy chatting and having a grand time. We stayed around until it started to get dark. But, suddenly (as per usual during that week), I felt an urge to go. Uh -oh. Panic creeping into my voice a little, I ask Hugo "is there is a public bathroom anywhere?" He gestures toward an old church we'd passed that was a few blocks away. 

I make one of my friends go with me, and we hurry over to the church. As we approach the church, out of the darkness comes this old man with his hand out. I'm pretty sure I hear some word sounding like "cigarette" so I assume he wants a light or something. I say in spanish "i don't have it sorry." and continue quickly up the walk towards the restroom. we finally reach the door marked banos, and to my horror see that there is a wrought iron gate closed over the door.

nooo!

i knock on the door and rattle the gate loudly, hoping someone inside will hear me and open up. i'm freaking out now, i don't know what i'll do. i'm not gonna make it to another public bathroom, and i'm not even sure there is another one within walking distance.

ahhh!

my friend is laughing while i twirl around and squeal about what to do.. 

and oh my god. i was going to have to go into a hidden corner and jsut do it there...

oh      my    god

my friend is laughing hysterically at this point and point out a tall metal barrel. "you could go in there"

i seriously consider it for what seems like an eternity but what is probably just a few seconds

the old man comes strolling up the path with a quizzical look on his face, probably wondering what all the noise is about. then i notice--- there are keys in his hand.

duh! he is in charge of the bathrooms and wanted a few pesos. well i feel stupid but thank god!! i give him the money and he unlocks the door. i think at the last second to ask for some toilet paper.

i think we all know that i learned some very valuable lessons from this story, if it is a little bit TMI

the end.