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I Don't Talk to My Dad

Haven't For About 3-5 Years I Think, Or No Wait.

By: LuckymeIshouldsee
Written on March 18th, 2010

 

The story is simple really, my mother and I moved miles away about 5 years ago. Since then I had no contact with him whatsoever. When I realized I wanted to , I tried but with no success. I remember I once called him in 08 and finally got through, he said he would call me back. He called back and i think he said how are ya, good . I gotta go ill call you. I never got a call back. I even asked his sister about his whereabout and how he's doing and such but nothing. I emailed him back in nov and got vague responses that varied from " i don't want to talk to any family" to "I dont want any contact, i am in a bad time of life" and to  i think it was "im fine how are you" very vague emails. Not much communication.

I then emailed a short one saying I loved him regardless and wanted to welcome him into my life and never got a response back. (this was all in nov)

And then it turned out that he had spoken to his sister and my niece , who live in canada btw as do i!, around christmas time. Sort of like a merry christmas call. I didn't get one, nor did i get an email.

I don't really know what the deal with him is, I mean i used to be curious to know you know? But now I just figure well, let bygones be bygones. It's not that I gave up on a relationship of some sort, Ill welcome him or any one at any time really! But I can't force him. 

 

That's all.

By: LuckymeIshouldsee
Age: 18-21
672 people have read this story

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    Daddistressed
    Daddistressed

    It's been 2 years since this post so I hope you've had a proper contact with your father. if not I can say this to you. I read this post, and you speak so lightly of not seeing your father for 5 years, moving away, having no contact. I am in the same situation now and I can tell you the pain, the hurt and the emptiness of not having your children in your life is almost unbearable. if you or your mom threatened him, destroyed him in anyway or gave him a fright, or broke him then this is what can happen. The father can reach a stage where they need to protect themselves from further hurt or drama. These are the consequences unfortunately. i hope I don't find myself feeling like your father but I can tell you i probably wouldn't be so welcoming either, and would prefer an expert third party relationship counsellor was present. It's just not that easy for rejected dads, especially if it were nasty and threatening.

    Jan 31
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      LuckymeIshouldsee
      LuckymeIshouldsee

      We have spoken a few times since then, we have even seen each other. A few phone calls back he had actually cried on the phone with me and hung up from feeling onverwhelmed. I am very careful in my approach which is likely because I am afraid of feeling hurt again.
      Thank you for your response. I wish you well. Feel free to chat if you think I may be of service to you.

      Jan 31
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    RavenDelcor
    RavenDelcor

    Jeez! I do not have a father or mother who is alive but, my sister with whom I shared so much of my life has done something similar with me. I tried for ten years to get back in touch with her. I sent letters, phone calls, and e-mails and no response for ten years. We used to write letters two or three times a month. She finally responded to an e-mail where I asked her if I had killed her brother (meaning me). She sent back a response, "biology does not dictate friendship." I sent more emails asking her what I needed to do, what was the thing that I had done, you know, all the self-blame stuff. No answer. So I wrote a short email and simply said at the end of it what you told your father, that no matter what, I loved her. Three months later, she sent me four words: I love you too. I haven't heard from her since. She lives in Vancouver, if you're out that way. It is far from here in Wisconsin.

    Still, I like your steadfastness and your strength. Smiles!

    Mar 19, 2010
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    ustraveler
    ustraveler

    One Day he will realize



    My dad is the same way

    Mar 18, 2010
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