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My Own Fault.wy

i have a great family, decent group of friends and an overall fun life.  im witty, fairly smart and can make people laugh.  ive dated but never let myself get too close to people.  im not terrible to look at and i have a pretty face (if im able to say that without sounding conceited) but on the inside i am absolutely miserable.  ive put on a lot of weight over the years and have destroyed my body.  i now weigh practically 200 pounds and i know that even if i lose the weight my body will not be attractive.  i just hate what i see and i cant stand what i did to myself.  its a terrible feeling to be so young and already know im going to be alone forever.  but how can i expect someone to fall in love with me when i look like this? im just hoping to find someone in a similar situation who can see past how i look but it doesnt seem likely.

asdjklf asdjklf 18-21 2 Responses May 21, 2009

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I am sorry for your burdens. I wish I could help. I try not to think about being alone for the rest of my life, because when I do I instantly decome dark and think about death. So I tread water everyday just trying to keep my head above water for that day.<br />
I would lose the weight you want to and then reaccess.<br />
I hope you have a great day.

One should try and be healthy, but above all else one needs to be confident in who they are. Confidence is sexy, smart is sexy, being a twig with no sense of self is not sexy. You may feel terrible about your body, but I think you're seeing the challenge in the wrong light. You could work to slim down, but at the same time, you should also work on your own body-awareness and coordination. If you can afford it, take up dancing at a smaller studio (*not* a chain like Fred Astaire or Shall We Dance). Not only is it a confidence-boosting activity that will also keep you active, but you might pick up tips and tricks about other aspects of life and being healthy, even if it doesn't affect your weight.<br />
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FYI, I don't know your height, but my spouse, best friend, and partner is roughly your weight at 5'6". But no, I'm not of the same proportions, just wise enough to see beyond the surface. To be any less would be superficial and moronic. Find the gems out there, we're hiding.