25 Years Old

I always just assumed that by 25 I would be married. My parents were married at that age and I guess that's why. I still live at home but there is a very good reason for this. With the economy the way it is I can't afford to live on my own and I my parents need help supporting my siblings. One who is currently jobless, one is mentally handicapped and the other is too young to get a job. Don't get me wrong..I don't mind living at home. I have a great family and I we have great times. Many of my friends live at home (or have just moved back home) due to the economy, because lets face it... sometimes (like in my case) mom and dad need help too. But any way thats not the point.
I have never dated really seriously. I had a boyfriend in highschool who "broke my heart" and while I was on the rebound another stepped in and smashed my heart to bits making me feel completly worthless...so I gave up dating and worked long hours.
I guess I have always been waiting for that moment that has been deep seeded in my heart where one day he will just walk in to my life and never leave. But I feel as though I have been waiting forever. I have always wanted that man...I remember praying at 12 years old that God would send me the man I am meant to be with...I am 25 now. It seems that every time I want a guy they either don't want me or something worse. One occassion a man that I was convinced was "the one" my "best friend" stabbed me in the back and got him instead. They have now been married for almost a year. I am not saying anything would have happend here and I don't think very highly of him anymore. He knew how I felt and never talked to me about it..just hurt me.

I thank God now because I know I could not deal with his selfishness. I have just rambled this whole time...but my heart hurts. I was watching a very good friend of mine today with his wife and I couldnt help but be envious of her. Not because I want her husband...thats not it at all!!...but because I want a good man, who loves me like he loves her. I want to know what they feel for each other. I want a man to look at me the way he looks at her..and such. It just hurts.
MidnightMoonBeam MidnightMoonBeam
22-25, F
7 Responses Oct 9, 2011

Same story.. I'm a guy, 25 years old, had an incredibly powerful relationship with my first love senior year of high school, fought long and hard to make it work, ultimately ending a year and a half later. Now I find myself "dating" women on average from 6 months to a year, sort of just living live, discovering myself.. having a good time. The breakup part is what sucks, and about todo it soon, then I'll be right back where you are. Don't feel alone, lots of people out there are in a similar situation. My grandmother is 89, I currently live with her, take care of her, work and pay all the bills... I've never been a pla<x>yer so women don't flock to me or throw themselves in my face.. and I'm a good looking, handsome, well paid muscular guy.. Just nothing seems to compare or add up to the feelings I had in that first relationship..

I remember how you feel, I was in my mid 20's and I didn't feel it would happen for me either, it was all I wished for in the world...but it did and I really wish it hadn't. Marriage is the worst experience of my life. I've watch friends and co-workers go through horrible divorces and watched my own marriage fail though barely alive. Then again my best friend never got married and I see how lonely he is. I sometimes feel responsible for him not getting married because he seen how terrible my marriage was. I really don't know what's worse, but if it doesn't happen for you, maybe it's for the best. Either way I hope that you have a happy life. Several have said on here that waiting till later makes for happier marriages. I really wish I would have waited and perhaps I would have made a better choice. Maybe that's the way it will happen for you.

I'm 25 too and I can relate to your story very very much, I don't think I'll get married either and it breaks my heart

Things happen when they are meant to not on our time table! If you have what Oprah calls a flexible destiny, you won't miss out on life's golden opportunities. I know this too well. I wanted to be married before I was 30 and it didn't happen so what did I do, I went out and made it happen. Well guess what that ended in divorce. I did it again at 40. And I'm staring down the barrell of divorce 2. So, take it from me, enjoy your life and your youth.

I feel for you. I got married at 19 and was divorced by age 21. I'm now 25, and I also live at home because I decided to go back to school full-time. I'm a very co-dependent person and sometimes wonder if God's waiting for me to be independent before bringing me "the one". But it's hard. It's hard to wait when it seems like everyone around you is finding their soul mates. Hang in there. It sounds like you're the type of person that has their head on straight. Love will find you soon enough.

marriages at a young age fails, I would know, Ive done it! I got married at 19 and just recently got a divorce... I'm 21. If you are in a rush its more likely you will fall for anyone. I bet you will find the most perfect person and have a happy life, you just need to be patient.

I'm sorry midnight. After reading your whole story I see that you really need companionship.<br />
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Now that I am 43, I look back at my life and think of how young and immature I was when I was in my early 20s. From my experience a person shouldn't get married until they are at least 25. A person goes through a lot of changes and by that age, they have discovered who they are and are much better equipped for a lasting relationship.<br />
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If you truly want to get married and want it to be the love of your life. Don't be in a hurry for it. You might fall for a person who is reasonable but not great. It has happened to me. I'm codependent. I always have been. I think the best way to enjoy something is to share it with someone else. So I got married and we grew apart after 7 years because of the Army. I got married again 5 years after that. We are slowly falling apart after 9 years and I don't even know why this time. You feel that your date in high school broke your heart. How much time were you together? Imagine if a spouse of 9 years breaks your heart? Single is not such a bad thing.<br />
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Don't rush love kiddo. Be social, enjoy the dates and keep your head up. When the time is right you will find someone to be with that truly makes you happy.