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The Death Of Pollyanna...

Maybe this is just an experience that comes with living.

Maybe I got here so late because I married young and therefore got my delusions later in life.

But I'm coming to learn that people aren't often what they portray themselves to be.

And the Perpetual Pollyanna finally falls from the tree, and realizes that it's not really that easy to be "glad" all the time. Because the "Big Bad Wolf" isn't just a character in a children's tale. He is out there. Masquerading, not as a sheep, but as her neighbor, her doctor, her local supermarket employee, her next date, and maybe even her best friend.

And suddenly, the little girl who gave hope to everyone has none to spare for herself.

And everything was just a lie after all.

And she really has no one but herself to count on, and that's not really that much...
onceandfutureglow onceandfutureglow 31-35, F 6 Responses Mar 24, 2012

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I find this wonderfully written. It is true about life. All the disappointments stack up as the years go by. I reflect on what gave me joy. I had one very good friend who passed away. He was truly a friend. I suppose I was lucky to have had one very good friend. In this world they are hard to find.

I have to accept that life will never be what I wish it to be. I have to live for myself. My biggest disappointments happened when I was living for other people. We can't lose touch with how important it is to stay focused on our own needs.

I too have enjoyed a life based.on a firm commitment to respect and trust others as equals, each person I meet, until they present a reason for me to revoke trust or respect. Yes, I tell my children, this puts you out there to be suprised disappointed and hurt by others. But most people are worth the risk. And sometimes just that sincere belief in a person, expecting the best of them, can inspire them to be worthy of your trust. Lately however life has taught me to be more self protective and remind myself things are not always that simple. I have now been hurt by trusting so deeply the wounds were almost mortal. I had no idea what people were talking about when they cried about betrayal. How that could destroy you if you let it. But I understand it now.

I would still rather be the one who gets hurt from trusting than the one who betrays someone's trust. I'm proud to say I don't think. I have that in me. I believe there's a reason I haven't lost my faith in people. Someday someone may need that from me. They will be worthy. And I will have known they were there all along.

We are all flawed. We all have hopes, desires, dreams....and sometimes bad decisions are made in a weak moment when we loose sight of where we want to be. There are those that truly only care for themselves, unabated by the torment they force on others....but there are those that had have their lives defined by others based on a mistake....forever reminded, forever unforgiven.



People are two-sided...the side they need people to see, and the side they fear people will find. Trust is allowing someone to see the side we all fear to show, and hope that, even though they will likely not understand, they will forgive.



Trust comes with a price....it is something that is earned...but forever changes things.



We all miss you.

Glowy, trust what is good and loving in yourself.



You are connected to lots of good people and never alone

This may not be the best of all possible worlds, but there is a lot of good and beauty in this one if we open our eyes to it. Many people are not worthy of our trust -- perhaps even most of them, but some of them are. It is those exceptions that make life delightful.

Someone always tell faerie that I only have myself to rely on. I also thought that wasn't much to begin with...



But the wolf is only bigger because we let them be bigger and let them growl louder...



*faerie growls at wolf*

I kinda like the wolf though... kidding... *hugs!!!* Miss you...